Coworker on phone: Just wear your own clothes.
Arlington, Virginia
Overheard by: DC Diva
Coworker on phone: Just wear your own clothes.
Arlington, Virginia
Overheard by: DC Diva
Female on cell in hallway: HPV. HPV. No, not HIV, HPV. You know, the warts… Yeah, HPV. I don't know, freeze them off maybe?
O'Fallon, Missouri
Suit on cell: I went across the street to the Chinese/Thai food place for lunch, and not everything afterwards went according to plan. I've spent enough time in the bathroom this afternoon to finish reading a book. I know you weren't necessarily dying for that information, but that's the reason this took me a while to finish. I will still be billing two hours to this, though, even though it took a bit longer.
Manhattan, New York
Receptionist on phone: He fell into some kind of sink hole, and when they pulled him out he had leeches all over his feet!
Palo Alto, California
IT server guy on cell: Yeah, it'll get really huge, and it'll stay like that for awhile…
Santa Clara, California
Overheard by: braingauis
Woman on phone: Mom, tell my brother that if he doesn’t pick up his car, I’m gonna have it towed.
[pause]
Woman on phone: Because I don’t want it parked in front of my house.
[pause]
Woman on phone: Because I don’t want to advertise to the entire neighborhood that black people live here.
465 Main Street
Charlestown, Massachusetts
Admin on phone: I’m sorry I just wanted to double check that you received it. I am a bit of a wigger.
Pause.
Admin: Wigger? You know, I wig out about stuff.
Pause.
Admin: No, I don’t know another meaning to the word wigger, but I guess it’s bad since your’re telling me not to say it.
333 Earle Boulevard
Uniondale, New York
Very white girl in business suit on cell in cafeteria: No, I haven't told him yet, I just found out for sure this morning. (pause) Well, I don't have his phone number anymore, I took it out of my phone so I wouldn't drunk dial. (pause) I don't know, I know his address, so maybe I'll just send him a card. “Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm having a baby, and so are you”. (pause) Hey, maybe a singing telegram to him at work. That'll go over big. (pause) He's an elementary school teacher… that would probably get him fired. (pulls out ghetto accent) And you know my baby daddy better have hisself a job!
Princeton, New Jersey
Overheard by: Currrly!
Suit on cell: I’m going home and changing into shorts. It’s so hot out there I need to throw up.
Washington Mutual
Livermore, California
Overheard by: Stephen
Attorney: Oh, god, not her. She is an insufferable hag. Tell her I’m not in the office.
Temp on phone: I’m sorry, ma’am, he’s out of the office… Well, I apologize, but he’s not here right now… Yes, I’m aware that lying to another attorney is unethical… Ma’am, you did not hear his voice in the background… No, I’m telling you, he’s not here… Well, how do you know that was his voice? Couldn’t it have been an intern or another attorney? … Well if it sounded like him, who’s to say his son isn’t visiting today and that’s whose voice you heard? Yes, I’ll give him the message. Thank you.
Attorney: So… Have you considered law school?
Long Island law firm
Long Island, New York
