Forgetful manager: Fool me once… Um… Shame on me… Fool me twice… And… I'll have to file a disciplinary report on you.
Boulder, Colorado
Overheard by: clang
Forgetful manager: Fool me once… Um… Shame on me… Fool me twice… And… I'll have to file a disciplinary report on you.
Boulder, Colorado
Overheard by: clang
Office worker: Okay, who started the cookie rumor? I have 45 people coming to my desk asking me for some cookies that I made!
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: maryk
Female estimator: My boss is going to deep dive me on this tomorrow. He knows where all my holes are.
Everett, Washington
PA: Buffy Capri, please call the operator, Buffy Capri.
Secretary #1: Who the hell is Buffy Capri?
Secretary #2: I don’t know. An exotic dancer or a porn star?
Secretary #1: Buffy Capri, you’re wanted on the lido deck.
Secretary #3: She’s a paralegal. With a dumb name.
Atlanta, Georgia
Very white supervisor: Are we keeping it gangster in here?
Annoying cubicle inhabitant: Oh yeah. We keep it real gangster.
Morris Plains, New Jersey
Overheard by: the intern in the next cubicle
Female designer: I’ve been yoinked a lot today.
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Meg
Cubicle guy, coming around the corner: Stacy… you’re in trouble. Oh… Stacy isn’t here today? No? Well, in that case, I’ll just leave a sticky on her desk for her return.
Guy in next cubicle: Dude, that’s disgusting.
Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Overheard by: Marko
President: In the process of moving our data center across the Atlantic, we have eliminated the Director of Operations position. We will not be refilling it.
Ops member: Are we downsizing?
President: Well, we are down one.
Spear Street
San Francisco, California
Engineer: Did you see that e-mail bob sent?
Technician: Yes, he’s creating an army of idiots in his own image!
Wayne, Pennsylvania
Employee #1: Where does our CEO go? He randomly disappears for days.
Employee #2: He goes to CEO mountain, where all the CEOs stand around and circle jerk.
[CEO walks in minutes later.]Employee #1: Hey Ben*, where were you? CEO mountain?
CEO: [Laughs.] Yeah, CEO mountain.
Employee #2: What do you guys do up there?
CEO: We all stand around and talk about our truculent staff.
Cambridge, Massachusetts
