Woman #1: He had such a big penis.
Woman #2: Oh my God, that is so hot. Did you hear about Richard*?
Woman #1: But he is a subordinate! I am not cheating on my husband with a subordinate. It feels more guilty that way. At least I feel like I’m gaining more than pleasure from sleeping with the exec.
Main Street
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Lead animator: Quit goofing off!
Animator: I’m not.
Lead animator: I said no goofing off! Get to work!
Animator: I am working.
Lead animator, hitting animator with poster: No talking! Get to work!
Animator: I am working!
Lead animator: [Picks up computer mouse, and throws it across the desk.] Get to work! No talking!
Las Cruces, New Mexico
Overheard by: pretty picture guy
Employee: Nice skirt, boss!
Boss: I'm wearing pants.
Anchorage, Alaska
Trader: If you’re drunk or high come over and share, but if you’re retarded I can’t help you.
1801 East 9th Street
Cleveland, Ohio
Overheard by: her boss
VP: I don’t necessarily want you to improve one thing by 100%, but if you improve 100 things by 1% you will still have made 100% improvement. That’s all I ask.
5720 Peachtree Parkway
Norcross, Georgia
Suit to a group of coworkers who just crowded into elevator: Do you think we’ll get to talk about Matt’s nuggets at this morning’s meeting?
SoMa
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Green
Mailroom girl #1: Ugh! No speaking in French while I’m counting mail!
Mailroom girl #2: Sweet Jesus, every day there’s a new rule!
Ft. Lowell and Alvernon
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: dances with wolverines
Senior sales VP: I need to set apart a set amount of time every day so I'm not bothered. That's the time I need to be strategical.
Fort Myers, Florida
CSR #1, complaining about trainee: All this guy keeps saying is “I'm a senior engineer; I already know what I'm doing,” and flat out refuses to listen to what I'm telling him. I mean, it's just a title, guy. Stop being a dick.
CSR #2: Oh, yeah? Well I'm a customer service representative. I don't represent shit!
Chesapeake, Virginia
Designer: We can’t afford naked people. All of those photos are rights managed. So tomorrow I’m bringing in my digital camera.
2001 Lind Avenue SW
Renton, Washington
