Worker #1: We grilled chicken hearts the other night.
Worker #2: Really? Like, how big are they?
Worker #1, gesturing: Not very. We have to make several skewers full because they are so little.
Worker #2: Do you even know how many chickens it takes to get one heart? Poor things!
Virginia
Male coworker #1: Megan* says she's going to Taco Bell for lunch and she hopes nobody is pissed.
Male coworker #2: Why would someone be pissed?
Male coworker #1: Cause she knows that you like some Taco Bell.
Male coworker #2: I do,but I certainly am not in the business of depriving people of Taco Bell.
Lynchburg, Virginia
Cube dweller to another: If you want the full effects of the Smarties, you need to freebase them.
Pioneer Square
Seattle, Washington
Seemingly normal customer: It's revealing when the lolly-boxes clatter, isn't it? Revealing!
Cashier: Er, yes. (awkward laughter)
Vegetable Shop
Western Australia
Australia
Overheard by: Cara
Customer: How much does one of those pork chops weigh?
Meat market employee: It depends on how big they are.
Peoria, Illinois
Colleague on phone: He sits in his office reading the paper, and then he wanders out, shits on everybody, eats their French fries, and leaves.
London
Canadia
Peon #1: Why didn't she put the cream that I bought on the buffet table?
Peon #2: I don't think she knows what cream looks like.
Falls Church, Virginia
Coworker to table: Guys, as much as I love talking about poo, do we have to talk about it every meal?
Los Angeles, California
Chipper CSA: I'm showing you completely surrounded by the orange!
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: They'll Never Take Me Alive!
Receptionist: There was so much sausage cooking I felt like I was taking a sausage bath.
Eye Doctor's Office
Manhattan, New York
