Overweight female employee: I can't have more than two cupcakes because I'm on a diet.
Marlborough, Massachusetts
Overweight female employee: I can't have more than two cupcakes because I'm on a diet.
Marlborough, Massachusetts
Office girl #1: My son's girlfriend gets sandwiches that are just bread and cheese.
Office girl #2: Just bread and cheese?
Office girl #1: Yep, just bread and cheese.
Office girl #3: No bread? Just cheese?
Office girl #1: Bread and cheese.
Des Moines, Iowa
Overheard by: B Frazier
Hot lady peon, after spilling candy: I hope he doesn’t come by while I’m on the floor eating his jelly beans.
3900 Paramount Parkway
Morrisville, North Carolina
Overheard by: kevin
Cockney waitress to customer: We haven't got any chicken sandwiches, but I can do an impersonation!
Rye
England
Boss man, picking up bill at lunch: Well, I can either pay for this lunch or we can all draw straws to see who gets laid off.
Amherst, Ohio
Overheard by: I hate this place
Very pregnant office hoochie: I need to hurry and get outside for one last smoke break before my lunch is over, but I can't go fast with this waddle!
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Worker #1: What's up wit dat new chick, the one haulin' dirt, she Korean?
Worker #2: Naw, she's Native American.
Worker #1: Dat's hot yo, I wonder what Indian pussy taste like?
Worker #2: (long pause) Maize?
WTC Memorial Site
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Bob
Office drone #1: Would you go get me a coffee, please?
Office drone #2: What?
Office drone #1: I asked you to get me some coffee.
Office drone #2: (silence)
Office drone #1: I did say “please.”
Office drone #2: Okay, then. (pause) No, thank you.
Manhattan, New York
Woman #1: Oh, look at the pretty rock!
Woman #2: Um… that’s part of a blueberry muffin.
Woman #1: Oh.
Monument Circle
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Gitcher Eyes Checked
Co-Worker: I spilled my milk this morning and my husband was like, "Don’t cry over spilled milk." He’s always saying funny things like that.
Carmel, Indiana
