Sales guy: …and then five years later, I’m into benchmarking.
Legal: That’s funny, when you said “Benchmarking” I heard “Bitchmarking”…sorry, ladies.
350 Madison Avenue
New York, NY
Sales guy: …and then five years later, I’m into benchmarking.
Legal: That’s funny, when you said “Benchmarking” I heard “Bitchmarking”…sorry, ladies.
350 Madison Avenue
New York, NY
Male assistant: Don't mind me, I'm just anal about this kind of thing.
Female attorney: No problem, anal is good, I like anal.
(long, silent pause)
Female attorney: Oh my god, please forget I just said that.
New Brunswick, New Jersey
Overheard by: Rhys
Opposing counsel: Can you take a leap of faith and eliminate paragraph 6 of the Agreement?
Partner: I think it would be malpractice for me to do so.
Opposing counsel: Malpractice per se, no; but probably not very wise of you either.
Huntington, New York
Overheard by: Lady Lawyer
Paralegal: What if the documents aren't there?
Lawyer: I'm going to get black-out drunk.
Manhattan, New York
Young attorney shouting to secretary: Anna*, is it Wednesday?
Secretary: Yes, Jim*.
Young attorney: Still?
Secretary: Yes, Jim, still.
Young attorney: Can you work on that?
Secretary: Sure, Jim.
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: wishing it was friday
Counselor: I'm sure he's a nice kid, but he looks like a beaver.
Decorah, Iowa
Overheard by: skm
Attorney: Why did you bill all of these overtime hours?
Paralegal: Because you're a faggot!
Manhattan, New York
Attorney, about opposing counsel: He's a bit of a hybrid. Like half gonorrhea and half jock itch.
Huntington, New York
Overheard by: Lady Lawyer
Legal secretary: What's the difference between a Crunch Bar and a Krackle?
Paralegal: I don't know. Maybe different companies make them?
Legal secretary: Yeah, probably.
Wichita, Kansas
Overheard by: Breaking off a piece of that Kit Kat Bar
Lawyer on phone: That's a shit town! (pause) You live in that town?!
Huntington, New York
Overheard by: Lady Lawyer
