Boss: Have a great Christmas, everyone. I’m going to go see my new grandkid.
Secretary: Aw. You have a new grandchild? Is this the first time
you’ll see it?
Boss: Yeah, they’re delivering by C-section on Wednesday.
2320 West Highway 76
Branson, Missouri
Worker bee #1: Hey, have you ever been at your buddies' house and really had to fart, but you didn't want to so you held it in for the longest time, but then you finally had to let it go, and just as you do his mom walks down the stairs?
Worker bee #2: I really have no idea what to say to that.
Worker bee #1: Yeah, it's never happened to me either, though I guess it's only a matter of time.
Lethbridge
Alberta
Canadia
CSR to friend: So apparently my lymphedema makes me more likely to get cancer in the future…
Boss, interrupting: That's a relief. Not that I'd wish cancer on you. More the fact that you're more likely to get it than me. I like that sort of news. We need more of that around here! (walks off).
CSR's friend: Here's HR's number.
Newcastle
England
Overheard by: Trying to hide
Butcher #1: What does that bacon look like to you
Butcher #2: An abortion?
Butcher #1: Exactly. So fix it!
1177 W. Market Street
Akron, Ohio
Overheard by: Nate Kelly
Assistant: I heard you told someone in the office that we're all on medication here. I take offense to that. I'm not on medication.
Boss: You should be. It gets you through the day so much easier.
Connecticut
Grunt: Why the hell should I care if some stupid Egyptian thinks I look like a ragamuffin?
Sutter Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Front Desk
Cube dweller #1: Want to go to lunch?
Cube dweller #2: Nah. I just farted.
Broomfield, Colorado
Overheard by: Russ G
Pretty girl: Sorry, I got distracted by my trash can!
Tulsa, Oklahoma
Coworker, during meeting: For instance, if Bob had a dentist appointment, we would need someone to cover the phones that day.
Boss: Are you kidding? Bob doesn't go to the dentist, have you smelled his breath?
Los Angeles, California
VP #1, during meeting: Yeah, she had the shingles.
VP #2: Okay, moving on…
VP #1: All over her back!
Glen Allen, Virginia
Overheard by: Shingle(less) White Female
