Marketer (to herself): You're not in my head today. What's wrong?
Camden Street
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Ren
Marketer (to herself): You're not in my head today. What's wrong?
Camden Street
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Ren
Pediatrician to screaming addicted newborn: Oh, you poor thing, are you jonesin’ for some crack?
NICU
Jacksonville, Florida
Account exec #1: So, are you still taking calcium?
Account exec #2: Yeah, and I’m still fucking crazy.
289 Pilot Road
Las Vegas, Nevada
Bathroom patron #1: You're takin' another shit? What are you, sick or something?
Bathroom patron #2: Nah, man, it's healthy. You're supposed to be takin' seven to ten shits a day.
Manhattan, New York
Male coworker to Helen: I shaved, Helen.
Helen: I thought we were going to keep that a secret.
Houston, Texas
Training teacher: So, what are some things that you guys think are covered under the Americans with Disabilities Act?
Male teen student: Obesity?
Training teacher, with blank stare: Um, I don't think so. Anyone else?
Female teen student: How about being an old person?
Training teacher: Oooooooh boy. How about we just take a look at this slide up here…
Duane Reade Career Center
Manhattan, New York
Co-Worker #1: My sister just had her baby this morning!
Co-Worker #2: How exciting! Wait, who just had a baby last month?
Co-Worker #1: My sister.
Co-Worker #2: The same one?
1700 Montgomery Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Stephanie
Male tech #1: Chris, are you pregnant and considering adoption?
Male tech #2: Yes. Wait, what?
Denville, New Jersey
Overheard by: BabakganoosH
Maniac: Come in, I won’t bite anymore.
Worker: …Won’t bite…anymore?
Maniac: I usedta work at a veternarian. He usedta lock me up with the animals in a cage! When they’d bark, the only way to get them to stop was to bark at them. And bite them–on the ear!
708 Broadway elevator
New York, NY
Overheard by: Kevin Davidson
Psychiatrist: I once made the mistake of taking a cat in the shower with me.
Elizabeth, New Jersey
Overheard by: invisi-tern
