Guy on cell in handicapped bathroom stall: No, now listen to me. No, you listen to me, man!
(loud, long, echoing fart) Hey, man, listen. How about I call you back? Yeah. Okay.
Richmond, Virginia
Guy on cell in handicapped bathroom stall: No, now listen to me. No, you listen to me, man!
(loud, long, echoing fart) Hey, man, listen. How about I call you back? Yeah. Okay.
Richmond, Virginia
Female night watch staff to others: And that one girl that keeps farting… Then she fluffs her blankets; it's so gross!
Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: Quit pretending your grossed out by it
Woman #1 in charity shop: He was in here for a long time, behaving oddly, and the other chap kept coming in and whispering to him and I was worried they were gonna steal something.
Woman #2 in charity shop: So he wasn't?
Woman #1 in charity shop: No, he was having a panic attack and the other one was his carer.
Woman #2 in charity shop: What was wrong with him?
Woman #1 in charity shop: I think he may have been homophobic…
London
England
Doctor to nurse: Obviously his continuing to smoke has made his lung cancer worse… But the smoking is doing wonders for his schizophrenia!
Corning, New York
Coworker on Wednesday: I need to give my kids a bath. I haven't given them one since Sunday.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Cha Cha D.
Female coworker: Anybody heard anything about Sue* yet?
IT guy: She is still on bed rest and waiting for the baby to make up her mind.
Office manager: Just like a woman, will come out when they want.
Mesquite, Nevada
Waitress to another: I really need to start taking a shower before I come to work.
Somerset, Pennsylvania
Customer: Do you have organic Tylenol?
Whole Foods
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Lady #1: I just had to explain to a 21-year-old what it's like to go to the gyno for the first time. I explained getting pried apart, the ovary exam and the breast exam.
Lady #2: What about the anal exam?
Ladies #1 and #3: (blank stare) What are you talking about?
Lady #2: Don't you get an anal exam at your gyno?
Ladies #1 and #3: No!
Lady #1: You were violated!
Lady #3: This is why I have a female gynecologist.
Lady #2: Well, that would explain why he complimented me on my shave, too.
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: Rizzy
Patient, filling out medical history form: It says here to list street drugs being used. (pause) Is insulin a street drug? I have been diabetic since I was a kid.
Warren, Michigan
