HR manager: God, I hate it when you bring me that junk!
Admin: These are people’s resumes.
HR manager: Fine, shove your junk in my box.
Admin: Excuse me?
HR manager: Just leave it in my box. I’ll throw it away in the morning.
80 Grasslands Road
Elmsford, New York
Overheard by: Bored Beyond Belief
Disgruntled worker: It would be easier if people just walked around with shirts that said, ‘I steal shit.’
University of Washington
Seattle, Washington
Nerd #1: All Brittney* talks about is food and sex.
Nerd #2: Yeah, what do you think she likes doing more: talking about eating while having sex, or talking about fucking while having lunch?
333 Pfingsten Road
Northbrook, Illinois
Overheard by: deltar
Coworker #1: Can you believe the whole company needs to take an ethics exam? It’s online, but still…
Coworker #2: Yeah, it sucks. I heard that one department’s doing the whole thing on a conference call together.
Coworker #1: But there’s a test…
Coworker #2: Yeah, they’re all taking the test together. One person says the answer and everybody enters it on their screen after the first person confirms it’s right.
Midtown
New York, New York
Manager on phone to client: Yeah, that’s like someone watching me take a shower, and after two kids, no one wants to see that.
1120 NW Couch Street
Portland, Oregon
Frustrated coworker: This karma thing has got to stop!
Husargatan 3 Uppsala
Sweden
Co-worker #1: Will someone please tell me what the fuck is wrong with [Josh]? When he gets up in the morning does he have some kind of funhouse mirror? Does he fucking see Tom Cruise when he looks in the mirror in the morning? Because when I look at him I just see an asshole.
Co-worker #2: Why?
Co-worker #1: He is bullshiting everyone and saying he slept with the new CSR.
Co-worker #2: Does it really matter? She don’t speak English!
2801 Red Lion Road
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Marketing manager to call center manager: The numbers you provided me on this spreadsheet don't add up.
Call center manager: Numbers only add up in a perfect world.
Sudbury
Ontario
Canadia
IT Guy: The last 15-20 minutes of my life have been wasted because you are a moron.
2100 Mckinney Ave.
Dallas, Texas
