Parent to teacher: Would it be possible for students to have extra recess time instead of silent reading?
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Parent to teacher: Would it be possible for students to have extra recess time instead of silent reading?
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Co-worker #1: Shoot. When I ordered these online, I thought they were full-sized legal pads!
Co-worker #2: Wow, those are definitely small. They’re barely legal!
525 B Street
San Diego, California
Designer: Hey, look, I’m finished with Page 2, now all I need are your lottery numbers.
EA: The numbers aren’t in yet…It’s going to be another 40 minutes before they come in.
Designer: Well, can’t you just forecast what the numbers will be?
200 E. Las Olas Boulevard
Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Overheard by: W. Texas Mike
Tech guy: Did you hear about all the snow in New York?
Help desk chick: Yeah, wow! That means it’ll be heading here to California.
Tech guy: (silence).
Imperial Highway Brea
California
Guy: So it turned out my phone wasn’t broken. It was just nobody wanted to call me.
Filton Road
Bristol, England
Overheard by: Rich
CSR: Good morning. ABC Bank* — how can I help you?
Customer: I’d like to talk to the person who answers the phones after hours — y’know, the 24-hour line?
CSR: The 24-hour line is automated, but I can put you through to–
Customer: –No, no, no. I want to talk to the lady who answers the phone when you’re closed.
CSR: Oh, see, that’s not an employee. It’s a recording.
Customer: What? No. See, I spoke to her three times last night and she knows my situation, so I need her. Is she there during the day?
CSR: … Sir, it’s not a real person. It’s a recording [hangs up].
Decatur, Tennessee
Coworker: My aunt refuses to get on a ferry. So I asked her why, and she said it's because they always sink. And I said, “When do you ever hear about ferries sinking?” and she said, “The ones coming up from Cuba! They sink all the time!”
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Manager: Seriously, guys. We have to be careful…Anything like
that happens again, we’ll be up a paddle without a handle.
606 Folsom Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Eve Benson
Coworker: They've done a complete 360 on this project.
Virginia
Overheard by: SexKitten
Orientation presenter: In all the code fives I've responded to over the years, there's only been one that involved a weapon. But if you hear “code five lobby” announced overhead, and then you hear shots fired, don't go into the lobby!
Albany General Hospital
Albany, Oregon
Overheard by: Naomi
