General Idiocy

Employee #1: There was a mouse in the hall. Did you kill it?
Employee #2: No, it’s just an animal. All it wants to do is find food and propagate the species.
Employee #3: Kind of like me.

Newark, New Jersey

Overheard by: Loki

Supervisor: I didn’t just say that to him because he’s gay, I would’ve said the same thing to you.
Worker: Oh yeah? How do you know I’m not gay?
Supervisor: I don’t. Are you?
Worker: Yes.
Supervisor: Okay then, have a nice day…

716 West Genesee Street
Syracuse, New York

Contracts officer: Frankly, I think she’ll be tickled shitless…I could have said she’d be shittled titless, but I thought that would be offensive.
HR lady: This meeting has now offically gone on too long.

1010 North Glebe Road
Arlington, Virginia

Female co-worker: My uncle just bought a condom in Brooklyn. It’s a real nice place.
Male co-worker: Really?
Female co-worker: Uh huh.

99 Church Street
New York, New York

Bimbo: She really didn’t betray him other than sleeping with someone else.

1300 Riverside Avenue
Fort Collins, Colorado

Overheard by: dazed and confused

Leasing rep: Well, the girl was 14 and her mother's 21! How is she going to learn anything with a mother like that? And the grandmother is only 32!

Randallstown, Maryland

Overheard by: tkap

20-something chick: Was it Colorado?
20-something dude: Yeah, that sounds right. There were a lot of unicorns.

Auburn, Massachusetts

Supervisor: Okay, let me give you some advice. I’ve seen a lot of Lifetime movies, and–
Employee: You know, I think I gotta ask someone else about this. Thanks, though!

107 Jackson Street
Berea, Kentucky

Boss: So what would be the wider business implamications of this?

Canberra
Australia

Overheard by: glad she wasn’t in that meeting

Coworker to another: My son got into GATE classes… He's not even smart!

Orange County, California