General Idiocy

Editor: We don’t have time to review the files. Have the vendors send their files directly to the printer. At this point, we’re approving crap.

8787 Orion Place
Columbus, Ohio

User: My computer won’t turn on.
Tech: The tower is missing. How do you expect to use a computer someone stole?
User: Well, they left the keyboard, mouse and monitor. Is that something?

498 7th Avenue
New York, NY

Co-worker on phone: Hello?…Do I have a minute to come up for a second?

385 Benedict Street
Port Townsend, Washington

Worker #1: Look, the window cleaners are here.
Worker #2: Aren’t they freezing? It’s 15 degrees out.
Worker #1: Oh no, the water they’re using is hot.

25800 Northwestern Highway
Southfield, Missouri

Interviewer: Tell us about your experience working with a team on a shared goal. We have a team environment here. We carry each other’s balls all the time.

6275 Neil Road
Reno, Nevada

Tech: You can’t save with Adobe Reader. You have to have Professional to save what you enter in the form.
Sales Assistant: But I have 6.0.
Tech: Yes, but in Reader. You have to have Professional.
Sales Assistant: So I can’t save?
Tech: Right.
Sales Assistant: But I have 6.0.
Tech: That doesn’t matter. You still can’t save the form.
Sales Assistant: But I have 6.0.
Tech: In Reader. You have to have Professional to save the data you enter in the form. Reader won’t let you save changes to a PDF.
Sales Assistant: Okay. But I have 6.0. Why can’t I save with that?

12100 I-40 East
Amarillo, Texas

Co-worker #1: Is this the small conference room, northwest corner?
Co-worker #2: It’s the smallest one.
Co-worker #1: So that’s why they gave it the name “small conference room”?

1661 Feehanville Drive
Mount Prospect, Illinois

Temp: This person gave their email address as being at “hotmail.con”. Should I enter it as “hotmail.com”?
Employee: No, put whatever is on the application.

1776 West Lakes Parkway
West Des Moines, Iowa

Manager: You all need to help out and pull a shift in the Concierge Department. This is what team work is all about. I make too much money to help in the Concierge Department.

47 East Beaver Creek Boulevard
Avon, Colorado

CCA: My Excel’s not working.
Manager: I don’t care.
CCA: What should I do if my Excel’s not working and you don’t care?
Manager: Call the Ghostbusters.

2 Charlotte Street
Sackville, New Brunswick
Canadia