Boss #1: Joe said we'll meet about it on Monday.
Assistant: Christmas eve?
Boss #1: Well… Yeah, I guess.
(shocked silence)
Boss #2: Joe's Canadian.
Stillwater, Oklahmoa
Boss #1: Joe said we'll meet about it on Monday.
Assistant: Christmas eve?
Boss #1: Well… Yeah, I guess.
(shocked silence)
Boss #2: Joe's Canadian.
Stillwater, Oklahmoa
Crazy lady: Help! My food has shit all over it! Help!
Young waitress: Wait, what?
Crazy lady: Don't “what” me.
Young waitress: No, really, what's wrong with it? Is it the wrong dish?
Crazy lady: You didn't tell me it had shit in it.
Young waitress: To what are you referring, precisely?
Crazy lady: The shit the shit the shit! (waves hands madly over dish, gesturing at her pasta, covered in a sauce)
Young waitress: Wait, do you mean the sauce?
Crazy lady: Don't “sauce” me!
Northville, Michigan
Female peon to IT peon: I just found a naked computer.
New York City, New York
New airport paging/information clerk: Paging passenger Emerson Bigguns, passenger Emerson Bigguns. Please call airport information from the nearest white courtesy phone.
(pregnant pause) Fuck!
Airport
San Antonio, Texas
Overheard by: YGBSM
Coworker: I didn't know there were two parts of Africa.
Bryan, Texas
Office peon: If I moved out to Phoenix I'd probably need a motorcycle. Taking advantage of the weather and…women and stuff.
Decatur, Illinois
Overheard by: Kelli
Guy to librarian: So, I heard y'all umm…loan books here?
Tallahassee, Florida
Overheard by: Club Strozier
Coworker showing visitor around office: And this is Dave*, he's the big cojones around here.
New York City, New York
Check-out clerk: How are you doing today?
Customer: I'm good, how are you doing?
Check-out clerk: My stomach hurts. Too much drinking.
Woodinville, Washington
Overheard by: Can sympathize
