Suit #1: We’re introducing a great new investment product.
Suit #2: Oh yeah. Features?
Suit #1: Well, if you die before it matures, you get your money back.
Wellington Street
Toronto
Canadia
Suit #1: We’re introducing a great new investment product.
Suit #2: Oh yeah. Features?
Suit #1: Well, if you die before it matures, you get your money back.
Wellington Street
Toronto
Canadia
Assistant: How’s your day going?
Office worker: I wish I was dead.
Assistant: Good to hear.
3990 Old Town Avenue
San Diego, California
Man on phone: Okay, so I heard you have a raccoon in your freezer.
[Pause]Man on phone: How did it get there?
[Pause]Man on phone: Did you kill it? What do you plan do with its body? What do you mean no one wants it?
S. Sycamore Street
Elizabethton
Tennessee
Overheard by: concerned for the racoon
Boss: So why aren't they meeting their targets?
Project manager: The original estimates assumed attrition, and they haven't had any. (awkward pause) Except death.
Cincinnati, Ohio
Driver: I need to go home. There’s been an emergency.
Dispatcher: Oh! What happened?
Driver: Oh, my dad croaked, and I need to get maintenance on my truck. No biggie.
Dispatcher: Uh, okay.
7253 Western Select Drive
Indianapolis, Indiana
Insurance salesman: Now, you can only die once, but you can become disabled many times.
Florida
Boss: If you’re going to get electrocuted, do it on your own time.
4610 Mission Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Hugo Delgado
Excited supervisor: Want to see pictures of my dead cat?
Fairfax, Virginia
Office manager, getting off phone: Well, that was awkward. She said that Jim died in march.
Accountant: He didn't leave any unpaid invoices, right?
Orange, California
Overheard by: Peon with a soul
