Happy New Year's!

Waitress: (lifts heavy box and grunts)
Waiter: Are you okay?
Waitress: Yeah, I think my balls just dropped.

Restaurant
Ohio

Posted on July 30, 2015
Body Parts, Coworkers, General Idiocy, Ohio, Questions

It’s Just a Regular Nose — God!

Over the loudspeaker: Tiny Steve*, please call 3-8-1*. Tiny Steve… Where is Tiny Steve?

Tampa, Florida

Posted on July 30, 2015
Coworkers, Default, Florida, Names, Offers and requests, Questions

Tragically, Hitting the Bottle.

Lady in office: That's odd…I just got a voice mail from a baby!
Man: When did that happen?
Lady in office: 11 pm last night…what was a baby even doing up at that hour?

Washington, DC

Overheard by: MIke

Posted on July 30, 2015
Coworkers, General Idiocy, On the phone, Questions, Washington DC

The Propmasters on Indiana Jones Movies Are Always Kept on Their Toes

Coworker wandering lobby, on cell: Why are you going to be late this time? What do you mean the camel got loose and knocked over the “wheel of death!”

The Red Brick Hell House
Upper Alberta
Canadia

Overheard by: Lackey

Posted on July 30, 2015
Accidents, Animals, Canadia, Coworkers, On the phone, Questions, Weirdness

1PM Lunch

Office Manager: How do you spell “Useta”?
Co-worker: Use it in a sentence.
Office Manager: I “useta” drink Cokes; now I only drink water.
Co-worker: That is an Arkansas word.

1700 Westpark Drive
Little Rock, Arkansas

Posted on July 30, 2015
Arkansas, Coworkers, Dumb Bosses, General Idiocy, Geography & History, Words

When Nerds Dream.

20-something female coworker, about guy he's met online: He's so smart. He uses real sentences, with real words, with real punctuation!

Grandview Heights, Ohio

Overheard by: Rich Hamburglar

Posted on July 29, 2015
Coworkers, Education, Feelings, Ohio, Relationships, Words

1PM Lunch

Co-worker #1: I swear, you’d think we never eat the way we jump on the free food.
Co-worker #2: If it weren’t for work I don’t think I would eat.
Co-worker #1: Yeah, but I always forget and eat and then I have to eat again when it’s free.
Co-worker #2: Not me. I wait for it. But sometimes that’s bad, ’cause like, then one day I’ll be hungry and I’ll be all like, “Why didn’t you guys have a meeting today?!”

640 5th Avenue
New York, NY

Posted on July 29, 2015
Coworkers, Meals and Snacks, Meetings, New York, Questions, Time Management

We're Totally Trying This at Home Later

Male coworker, after giving himself makeshift manicure using staple remover: So I guess I'm not too good at that.
Female manager: Are you bleeding? Well, suck on it before you get an infection… and stop touching yourself!
Male coworker, whimpering: Aaaww…
Female manager: Gross!

San Diego, California

Overheard by: that's why you pay people to do that…