Smoking worker: You know, I haven't even smoked today yet!
Non-smoking worker: Me either.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: thorn
Smoking worker: You know, I haven't even smoked today yet!
Non-smoking worker: Me either.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: thorn
Employee: Yeah, and they are supposed to be a big agency.
Boss: Well, bigger is not always better.
Employee: I'd have to disagree in some cases.
Boss: You are dirty, get out of my office.
Scottsdale, Arizona
Old woman, filling out request for copy of marriage license form: Mine's kind of crooked. Is yours crooked? (pause) Oh, I'm filling out an application for a marriage license. I don't want to do that again!
New Haven, Connecticut
Overheard by: Alexis
Goofy redhead: Third world countries are just… so poor.
Louisville, Kentucky
Overheard by: And water is just… so wet.
Boss #1: Look at all that red on there!
Secretary: Yeah, well, it's a short paragraph.
Boss #1: Well, you know what they say about guys with short paragraphs…
Boss #2: You get red fast!
Boss #1: It's not the size of the paragraph that matters, it's the frequency.
Oak Brook, Illinois
Male systems analyst: Why don't you just finish that bottle of water? You've only got like two swallows left.
Female student intern: Oh, I've swallowed a lot more than that.
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
IT guy: If you're going to buy a Mac at this place, why don't you just save some money and buy a sack of potatoes instead? They'll both do the same amount of computing and a sack of potatoes is a lot cheaper!
Bethesda, Maryland
Overheard by: IT Chick
Guy to complaining girl: Well… At least we're not in Auschwitz.
Seattle, Washington
Cubicle rat #1: I don't understand how people drop babies.
Cubicle rat #2: What? Do you mean because they're awkward?
Cubicle rat #1: Yeah, they're just so heavy. They are like a glass of water, you know?
Cubicle rat #2: What?!
Cubicle rat #1: Yeah, I mean, unless it's like slippery or something.
Branchburg, New Jersey
Overheard by: So confused
Employee #1: You couldn't swing a cat in it, but she thought it was palatial.
Employee #2: What?
(pause)
Employee #1: Big.
Kilmarnock
Scotland
Overheard by: Traitorfish
