Co-worker: My fiance and I are going to LA this weekend, and I’m trying to lose a pound or two before then so my friends don’t think I’m pregnant.
1600 Amphitheatre Parkway
Mountain View, California
Co-worker: My fiance and I are going to LA this weekend, and I’m trying to lose a pound or two before then so my friends don’t think I’m pregnant.
1600 Amphitheatre Parkway
Mountain View, California
Coworker #1: Mayonnaise or Miracle Whip?
Coworker #2: Miracle Whip. If I'm going to eat a bowl of mayonnaise, I'm going totally cracker–Iowa style.
Santa Monica, California
Overheard by: Amused and Grossed Out
Secretary: What I’d give for an eight-year-old vagina again…
Orange County, California
Assistant: I don’t think you’re crazy. I may vomit on you, but I don’t think you’re crazy.
9050 Washington Boulevard
Culver City, California
Male student entering Principal’s office: Someone’s been gluing pennies to the urinal again!
Arcadia, California
Overheard by: The Know It All
Male employee: This chocolate is divine.
Female employee: What did you say?
Male employee: This chocolate is… divine?
Emeryville, California
Coworker to boss: I hope he doesn't go because his protruding nose hairs are very distracting.
Los Angeles, California
Police sergeant: Have you done those sexual child abuse talks at the school yet?
Civilian employee: Yes, and several of the children need to file a report.
Police sergeant: Great! Now we have more work. Whose idea was it to do those talks?
8620 California Avenue
South Gate, California
Director: For your baby shower, are people buying pink or blue?
VP: Blue. Doctor says there’s a 50% chance it will be a boy.
San Fernando Boulevard
San Jose, California
Office mate #1: My brother's girlfriend brought dinner over last night.
Office mate #2: Is it weird–since you guys are twins– that your brother's girlfriend knows exactly what you look like naked?
Santa Monica, California
