3PM Birthday Cake!

Boss: And happy birthday to [Chris]. Today is his birthday
[Chris]: My birthday isn’t today, it’s in May.
Boss: This [planner] thing is useless.
Employee #2: It’s only as good as what you put into it.

111 South Michigan Avenue
Saginaw, Michigan

Posted on April 1, 2015
Bosses and Underlings, Comebacks, General Idiocy, Gripes, Michigan, Time Management

12PM Fax Info

Supervisor: I need you to fax this enrollment form to the dental insurance company right away.
Peon: Shouldn’t I make a copy first?

9111 Duke Boulevard
Mason, Ohio

Posted on April 1, 2015
Bosses and Underlings, General Idiocy, Offers and requests, Ohio, Technology

Sometimes Guys Like a Little Extra Friction

Director, pointing to picture: This sister? Is she older than you?
Employee: No I’m the oldest.
Director: She looks older than you. Both your sisters do.
Employee: That’s because they both stopped taking their estrogen. They dried up.

365 W Passaic St,
Rochelle Park, New Jersey

Overheard by: Cubicle right outside

Posted on March 31, 2015
Age and ageing, Bosses and Underlings, Family, Health & Hygiene, New Jersey, Physical Appearance, Questions

MacGyver: After Hours

Supervisor: Well, if that’s the case, all I need is a panda, a gun, and a bottle of wine.

Naperville, Illinois

Posted on March 30, 2015
Bosses and Underlings, Illinois, Midwest, United States

Steam-Powered Computers Require a Rugged Foundation

Worker bee: So my computer crashed.
Manager: So? Tell the technicians, not me.
Worker bee: No, I mean “crashed onto the floor of my office.”
Manager: What?
Worker bee: I told you the new desks were crap.

Canary Wharf
London
England

Overheard by: Hopeing the floors hold

Posted on March 29, 2015
Accidents, Bosses and Underlings, London, Technology

And Why Are All My Problems Self-Inflicted?

Boss: Who wants to do these reports?
Enthusiastic lady: I’ll take them! Will be done in no time.
Boss, 15 minutes later: Are those reports ready, Angie*?
Enthusiastic lady: I’m still on it.
Boss, 15 minutes later: I need those reports now.
Enthusiastic lady: I am working on them as fast as I can. [Boss leaves, then] Why does he give me so much work and keep asking me if it’s done?!

4340 Connecticut Avenue
Washington, DC

Overheard by: did not ask for work