Awkward bald man, walking into conference room: Does this work for you?
Obviously lesbian woman meeting with him: Whatever you want, this is all about you.
Awkward bald man: Wow! I wish my wife would say that! She never says anything like that.
Richmond, Virginia
Office worker: Well, I can't wait to diddle someone else…
East Hartford, Connecticut
Office drone #1: I'd like to get some hamsters. That'd be cool. Then I could get an eagle, and let them go in the backyard so the eagle could get some exercise.
Office drone #2: Who are you–Michael Vick?
Burlington, Vermont
Overheard by: Isotope Feeney
Office girl #1: She talks about him like he poops gold or something. Wouldn't it be great to poop gold?
Office girl #2: Um, no not really.
Office girl #1: Think about it. It's gold.
Office girl #2: Okay, I guess so. But, I mean, would it still smell?
Charleston, South Carolina
Overheard by: Peps
Very pregnant office hoochie: I need to hurry and get outside for one last smoke break before my lunch is over, but I can't go fast with this waddle!
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Drone on cell: Yeah, the trial is tomorrow… Well, he figured if he was going to prison for a rape he did not do, the state owed him a freebie.
Overland Park, Kansas
Female manager: I'm glad I took the day off! I'd rather be raptured at home.
Marlborough, Massachusetts
Office lady: I've been good–I haven't ordered anything from Amazon all week! Although I suppose the week isn't over yet…
Boss: It's Tuesday.
Denver, Colorado
Man at urinal: What I would really like to know is why my piss smells like tuna.
Men's Room
Chicago, Illinois
Chubby worker to young girl: Your hat is so cute! My niece would love it. Where did you get it?
Young girl in beaded hat: Limited Too!
Chubby worker, after girl has left: I don't have a niece. I will have that hat!
Chestnut Hill, Massachusetts
