Engineer #1: What is taking her so long?
Engineer #2: We're starving in here!
Engineer #1: Ya! Hasn't she ever heard of the Donner Party?!
Utah
Engineer #1: What is taking her so long?
Engineer #2: We're starving in here!
Engineer #1: Ya! Hasn't she ever heard of the Donner Party?!
Utah
Coworker #1, wielding a letter opener: C’mon, it isn’t that sharp.
Coworker #2: Still, in a fist-fight I’d pick it over bare fists.
Coworker #1, making a stabbing motion: Yeah!
3550 North University Avenue
Provo, Utah
Overheard by: Ambiguous Antecedent
Employee: Thanks for calling iTransact, can I help you?
Customer: Yes, I’d like to cancel my account, please.
Employee: No problem, sir. Can I have your name, please?
Customer: Yes, it’s ‘Frank.’ That’s ‘F’ as in ‘Frank,’ R-A-N-K.
Farmington, Utah
Waitress to customer: Can I get you something to drink?
Customer: We've never been to Moab before, so we don't know what we want to drink.
Restaurant
Moab, Utah
PR coordinator: How did that conference call go?
PR director: Well, I doodled a sketch of myself jumping off the top of our parking garage. So… not good.
Ad Agency
Salt Lake City, Utah
Overheard by: Mandorama
Employee #1: I can’t believe they made that bitch Employee of the Month.
Employee #2: Me, neither.
Employee #1: I’m going to the general manager.
Employee #2: Yeah, I’ll back you up.
Later.
Boss: Who the hell told her that was a good idea to come see me?
Employee #2: I don’t know, I tried to stop her.
999 South Main Street
Salt Lake City, Utah
Boss, reading through company e-mails: Can I talk to you about this e-mail you sent to a client?
Employee: Sure.
Boss: In this e-mail you started out with the word “yay”; when I read this it struck me as very unprofessional. You shouldn't use the word “yay” when speaking with our clients.
Employee: That doesn't say “yay, it says “yeah”. It's a response to a question the client had.
Boss: Y-e-a-h is “yay.” Let's not use it in e-mails in the future, okay?
Employee: Okay (then under breath as he walks away) Fucking moron!
Salt Lake City, Utah
Development manager: … So then I told my wife that even if we raised our granddaughter she could still end up like her mother. I mean, she doesn’t have tattoos, but she does drugs and she’s a tramp.
IT analyst: Don’t call your daughter a tramp, that’s not nice!
Development manager: Why not? She sleeps with every Tom, Dick and Harry!
IT analyst: At least she has a social life.
1600 South 900 West
Salt Lake City, Utah
Overheard by: Jealous
Office girl #1: So, when you mail something to Washington, DC, what’s the city and what’s the state?
Office girl #2: Put DC as the state.
Office girl #1: Does that mean Washington is the city?
Utah
