Last Time We Tried That, We Wound Up with Our Heads Glued Together!

Engineer #1: So, Tom*, I'm going to need you to get me up to date on all of these projects before you leave.
Engineer #2: Yes, I think a Vulcan mind meld is the best option.

Hill Field, Utah

Overheard by: Snickering Intern

Posted on July 23, 2021
Engineers, Language barrier, Pop culture, Utah, Weirdness

Then We Give It to the Clients, and It's a Happy Ending for Everyone

Data geek #1: Do they massage the data before they give it the clients?
Data geek #2: Oh, we massage it like it's Kobe beef.

Salt Lake City, Utah

Posted on March 29, 2021
Compare and contrast, Coworkers, Default, Dorks, Geeks, & Nerds, Meals and Snacks, Questions, Tech People, Utah, Weirdness

…Even If Many Of Them Are Cold Bitches.

Cool office guy: So do you do a lot of skiing?
Typical office worker: Oh, yeah.
Cool office guy: Yeah, you look like the type.
Typical office worker: Huh… Thanks?
Cool office guy: Oh, yeah. It's cool. I love skiers and snowboarders.

Salt Lake City, Utah

Overheard by: Tim

Posted on February 23, 2021
Compare and contrast, Coworkers, Possible Sexual Harassment, Questions, Utah

Can I at Least Steal Office Supplies?

Interviewer: Are you comfortable with the salary for this position?
Interviewee: Well, not really, but since I don’t currently have a job, I guess it’ll have to be okay.

Salt Lake City, Utah

Posted on February 10, 2021
Dumb Employees, Hiring & Firing, Utah

Is That Like Diddy's White Party?

Engineer #1: What is taking her so long?
Engineer #2: We're starving in here!
Engineer #1: Ya! Hasn't she ever heard of the Donner Party?!

Utah

Posted on September 29, 2020
Engineers, Geography & History, Questions, Time Management, Utah

Completely Missed the Point of the Workplace Violence Training

Coworker #1, wielding a letter opener: C’mon, it isn’t that sharp.
Coworker #2: Still, in a fist-fight I’d pick it over bare fists.
Coworker #1, making a stabbing motion: Yeah!

3550 North University Avenue
Provo, Utah

Overheard by: Ambiguous Antecedent

Posted on April 16, 2020
Coworkers, Utah, Violence

As Though Winnie the Pooh's “Honey Pot” Weren't Dirty Enough

Old lady to friend: I don't know who Madonna thinks she is writing children's books. She's still a slut.

Washington, Utah

Overheard by: Nick West

Posted on March 22, 2019
Arts, Friends, Insults, Music, Utah

He Spells ‘Foxtrot’ with a ‘Ph’

Employee: Thanks for calling iTransact, can I help you?
Customer: Yes, I’d like to cancel my account, please.
Employee: No problem, sir. Can I have your name, please?
Customer: Yes, it’s ‘Frank.’ That’s ‘F’ as in ‘Frank,’ R-A-N-K.

Farmington, Utah

Posted on February 12, 2018
Dumb Customers, Employees, General Idiocy, On the phone, Utah, Words

I'm Bringing You Warm Water from the Colorado River

Waitress to customer: Can I get you something to drink?
Customer: We've never been to Moab before, so we don't know what we want to drink.

Restaurant
Moab, Utah

Posted on December 17, 2017
Default, Drinking, Dumb Customers, Employees, General Idiocy, Offers and requests, Questions, Utah

But Then I Drew a Whole Family Of Bunnies. So…Better.

PR coordinator: How did that conference call go?
PR director: Well, I doodled a sketch of myself jumping off the top of our parking garage. So… not good.

Ad Agency
Salt Lake City, Utah

Overheard by: Mandorama

Posted on October 3, 2017
Bosses, Meetings, Questions, Utah, Weirdness