Receptionist on phone: Hey, little man! Did you go pee pee on the potty? (announcing to office) He peed on the potty!
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Receptionist on phone: Hey, little man! Did you go pee pee on the potty? (announcing to office) He peed on the potty!
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Worker #1: So I spent most of the weekend in the bathroom.
Worker #2: Oh, partying too much?
Worker #1: No, problem with the other end.
Worker #2: Oh, sounds like someone had a case of faucet ass.
Northbrook, Illinois
Overheard by: Not suffering from it
Female coworker, talking about the new waterless urinal installed: I don't understand how it's not gonna smell if you pee in there and no water washes it out.
Male coworker: There's oil in there that rises to the top and keeps the smell from coming back out. I'm about to go try it. Wanna watch?
Manchester, Connecticut
Office gal: So last night I learned that human skin is essentially an evolutionary trait that allowed us to run!
Office guy: Okay…
Office gal: Cause it has more sweat glands and less fur, which meant we didn't overheat when chasing down prey…
Office guy: Great. (turns to leave)
Office gal: Hey, where are you going?
Office guy: To the bathroom.
Office gal: Okay, but come back because I have more things to tell you about sweat!
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Man leaving bathroom: Find your floppy?
Man entering bathroom: Nope.
McDonald's Drive
Oakbrook, Illinois
New employee: Why do we have to get a key to go to the restroom? This isn't elementary school!
Researcher: Yeah, it's annoying, but there are advantages.
New hire employee: What's that?
Researcher: If you're having a stressful day at work, you can rub one out in private.
Phoenix, Arizona
Sales exec: I've seen things in the women's bathroom that I never want to see again in my life. And I've seen them more than once.
St Louis, Missouri
Redneck salesman #1: Don't you have a customer coming into the showroom?
Redneck salesman #2: I sure do, but if she's there when I walk in I'm gonna walk right by because I have got to take a shit.
Wichita, Kansas
Overheard by: crittle monkey
Secretary, looking for manager: Have you seen Thomas* anywhere?
Peon at photocopier outside restroom: Yeah, he's just gone in there. I think he might be a while.
Secretary: Why?
Peon: He was carrying some sandwiches and a coffee.
Onehunga
Auckland
New Zealand
Overheard by: KiwiBloke
Four-year-old boy: Mom…mom, I have to go potty.
Mom: Okay… Just a minute.
Four-year-old boy: Mom… Mom…I have to gooooo.
Mom: Okay…I said in just a minute.
Grandmother (standing up): I'll take him.
Mom: That's okay, I'll take him.
(grandmother turns away to sit down)
Four-year-old boy: Mom, I just gotta go to!
Mom: Okay honey… Just hold it for one second!
Four-year-old boy: Hold what?
Mexican Restaurant
Huntsville, Alabama
Overheard by: Melonia S
