The Main Criteria for Children's Beauty Pageants

Woman in lobby: I don't like 'em runny. I like 'em nice and stiff.

Horsham, Pennsylvania

Posted on June 5, 2015
Body Parts, Compare and contrast, Employees, Pennsylvania, Physical Appearance

Who'd Want a Woman When Goddesses Walk the Earth?

Female art director, watching male creatives gawking at models: They're just human.
Male copywriter: They're not human! Take that back!

New York City, New York

Overheard by: Lucy

Posted on June 1, 2015
Compare and contrast, Designers and Photographers, New York, Physical Appearance

Between Southern Girls, This Can Be a Two-Hour Conversation

Annoying coworker #1: You are so tan!
Annoying coworker #2: I know!
Annoying coworker #1: I can't believe how tan you are!
Annoying coworker #2: I know!

Washington, DC

Posted on May 30, 2015
Coworkers, Health & Hygiene, Physical Appearance, Washington DC

To Mirror the American Confusion About Other Cultures?

Coworker to graphic designer: Can we make the Tiki man more totem like?

Washington, DC

Posted on May 30, 2015
Coworkers, Designers and Photographers, Physical Appearance, Questions, Washington DC

Kind Of the Way That This Office Attracts the Feeble-Minded?

Coworker #1: Doesn't Tanisha look a bit hot under the collar there?
Coworker #2: Must be the weather.
Coworker #1: I feel so sorry for black people, considering black attracts the sun and all.

Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on May 21, 2015
Coworkers, Feelings, Massachusetts, Physical Appearance, Questions, Race, Weather

Hours Later, Bloody and Rumpled, They Declared a Truce

Managing director: Did you meet Daron* yesterday?
HR recruiter: Daron?
Managing director: I introduced him to you yesterday.
HR recruiter: Who?
Managing director: I did.
HR recruiter: No, you didn’t.
Managing director: … Maybe I’m going crazy. You know — Daron, with the dreads.
HR recruiter: With what?
Managing director: Dreads. You know — dreadlocks.
HR recruiter: Oh, I hate those.
Managing director: What? Dreadlocks have been around since the Bible.
HR recruiter: What?
Managing director: Since Samson and Delilah. Samson had dreads.
HR recruiter: Who did?
Managing director: Samson!
HR recruiter: You mean Daron?
Managing director: Who?

6105 Oakleaf Avenue
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: Ren

Posted on May 20, 2015
Bosses and Underlings, General Idiocy, Human Resources, Maryland, Physical Appearance, Questions

…Based Upon My Extensive Field Research.

Thin older executive assistant: I'm eating candy, my doctor says I gotta keep my fatty acids up.
Thin younger executive assistant: Your fatty asses?
Thin older executive assistant: Well, that's what candy leads to, I guess.

Tallahassee, Florida

Overheard by: DBA [giggling, one cube over]