Pennsylvania

Coworker to colleague, after phone call: I don't like that ring tone, it just sounds like a woman is breathing down my trousers…

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Mr. Blackwell

Dodgeball learner: So, are you allowed to grab the other team's balls?

Hanover, Pennsylvania

Security guard: What’s your pant size?
Male shop-lifter: I don’t know… I just started wearing girls’ pants last week.

101 Clearview Circle
Butler, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Charpie

Boss: It’s been a great week, except for the rash.

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Female motherly coworker who needs her back cracked: Will it hurt?
Young, hot, male coworker: It might. I usually do it from behind. I will kind of hug you while I do it quick.
Female motherly coworker: I don't know if I will like that. I don't want it to hurt me. Why don't you do it from the front?
Young, hot, male coworker: Okay, turn around.
Female motherly coworker: Ah, that's it! Right there. Oh, I needed that for such a long time…

Mountville, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Wow

Upper manager: Thomas* should be in, so maybe you'll be able to take a bathroom break before then.
Middle manager: Gosh, how generous of you!
Upper manager: Hey, I care about our employees (three seconds pause) and the floors in our stands.

Hershey, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: GottaGo

Loud female boss behind office door: Well, it's happened four times now. You obviously don't find me attractive anymore.
Boss' husband, on speakerphone: I don't control it! I simply submit requests!

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Male worker bee: Do you know it’s getting closer?
Female worker bee: Closer every day.
Male worker bee: But do you know what that means to me?
Female worker bee: I do. Eggs!

Intercourse, Pennsylvania

Judge: Do you read, write, and understand English?
Defendant: Sometimes.
Judge: When don't you?
Defendant: When I party!

Courthouse
Norristown, Pennsylvania

Contractor: That hairy-legged bitch.
Manceptionist: Oh yeah, she’s a fucking dyke. That’s why she has a bastard child.

3520 Lancaster Avenue
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania