Male coworker: I'm taking a Zumba class at the gym tonight.
Female coworker, deadpan: Isn't that what women do?
Male coworker, ignoring: They have this one thing where they make you link arms, and everyone is all covered in sweat.
Female coworker, still deadpan: You're going to get ringworm.
Bala Cynwyd, Pennsylvania
Black guy: What would you say if I said I wanted to get a Mystic Tan?
Tanning consultant: Oh, you could. It would give you a nice glow.
Black guy: You’re not even going to discourage me?! I would never get a spray on tan. The blacker you are, the higher people assume your crime rate is.
North 222 Plaza
Reading, Pennsylvania
Older, proper female professor #1, giggling: Well, I guess after that I should probably just invest in a new turkey baster.
Older, proper female professor #2: I should say so, my dear.
Swarthmore, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: This place is killing me…
Customer: You know we try to idiot-proof everything around here, but God keeps making smarter idiots.
500 Hertzog Boulevard
King of Prussia, Pennsylvania
Coworker to colleague, after phone call: I don't like that ring tone, it just sounds like a woman is breathing down my trousers…
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Mr. Blackwell
Dodgeball learner: So, are you allowed to grab the other team's balls?
Hanover, Pennsylvania
Security guard: What’s your pant size?
Male shop-lifter: I don’t know… I just started wearing girls’ pants last week.
101 Clearview Circle
Butler, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Charpie
Boss: It’s been a great week, except for the rash.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Female motherly coworker who needs her back cracked: Will it hurt?
Young, hot, male coworker: It might. I usually do it from behind. I will kind of hug you while I do it quick.
Female motherly coworker: I don't know if I will like that. I don't want it to hurt me. Why don't you do it from the front?
Young, hot, male coworker: Okay, turn around.
Female motherly coworker: Ah, that's it! Right there. Oh, I needed that for such a long time…
Mountville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Wow
Upper manager: Thomas* should be in, so maybe you'll be able to take a bathroom break before then.
Middle manager: Gosh, how generous of you!
Upper manager: Hey, I care about our employees (three seconds pause) and the floors in our stands.
Hershey, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: GottaGo
