Lady peon #1: Are you going to participate in Lou’s retirement party?
Lady peon #2: Yes — I’m going to jump out of the cake.
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: The Quotable Cubicle
Lady peon #1: Are you going to participate in Lou’s retirement party?
Lady peon #2: Yes — I’m going to jump out of the cake.
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: The Quotable Cubicle
Man on phone: Now, is this something that if I open it at home, it'll explode? Oh, right, in case a group of nuns is taking a tour. Well, thank you uncle Eugene! I hope you shoot something this weekend!
Scranton, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Who exactly is this Uncle Eugene?
Manager: Tell him we can sell it to him for 15,500.
Sales Rep: But we own it for, like, 21,600!
Manager: I know! But he ain’t gonna buy it anyway!
Sales Rep: But what if he says “I’ll take it!”? Then what?
Manager: Then you’re fucked!
Sales Rep: Why am I fucked?
Manager: Cause you’re the one telling him it’s 15-fucking-5!
3243 Paxton Street
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Doug Pintarch
Mother to child: No, we already have nine guns at home!
Wal-Mart Supercenter, Conneaut Lake Road
Meadville, Pennsylvania
Supervisor to worker: But why does it always have to be you!?
Norristown, Pennsylvania
Sales on phone: I trusted you not to destroy my testes.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Brad
Male co-worker #1: So what did you do for your birthday.
Male co-worker #2: Oh, the usual. Just some presents and breakfast in bed.
Female co-worker: My husband usually gets a blow job for his birthday.
Forbes Tower, University of Pittsburgh
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
CSR: I always put ’25’ when it’s supposed to be ’52.’ I must be anorexic.
1500 JFK Boulevard
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: indigo
Exasperated meeting contact: I think the temp I hired is mildly retarded, so I’m going to need your help with this.
Concierge: My mother drank and smoked while pregnant with me.
Penn and Liberty Avenues
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Cube rat: So, does he know that you gave him herpes? You know, it’s one thing to give him herpes, but his daughters, too?!
Chestnut Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
