Employee: I ordered 2448 washers today! What did you get done?
Boss: I took a big shit this morning.
Philadelphia, PA
Employee: I ordered 2448 washers today! What did you get done?
Boss: I took a big shit this morning.
Philadelphia, PA
Lab tech, during fire evacuation: Paul*, get out of the shade. It’s not in the safety zone.
Paul: But I’m fat. I can’t stand in the sun.
650 Cathill Road
Sellersville, Pennsylvania
Male employee: I think that guy was flirting with you.
Female employee: What are you talking about?
Male employee: You are like the workplace poster girl. Crap, is that harassment?
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Centerfold
Employee: Ew! You’re dousing your sandwich in tabasco sauce!
Intern: I’m dousing it in self-hatred.
4 W. Oakland Avenue
Doylestown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Vivian X
Boss to coworker #1: You know, you have quite the filthy mouth! Filthy, filthy!
Coworker #2 to boss: Like you don't!
Boss to coworker #2: Fuck you!
Bethlehem, Pennsylvania
Manager #1: Are we meeting sometime, today?
Manager #2: We already met.
Manager #1: Oh. Did I miss anything important?
Manager #2: Well, you missed the meeting.
19 N. 6th Street
Reading, Pennsylvania
Assistant editor, on Thursday: They want to get started on the Monday business page tonight.
Copy editor: How can you do that? What news are going to use?
Assistant editor: Well, we never use “real” news on Mondays.
Allentown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Art Department
Salesman: What you need to do is sashay out there and tell him like it is.
Boss: First of all, bro, I do not sashay.
State Street
Beaver, Pennsylvania
Visiting executive: So I want to talk about branch 512. What letter does the branch code end with?
Regional manager: Y.
Visiting executive: Y?
Regional manager: Yes, Y. As in “yak.”
Visiting executive: Oh, I see.
Regional manager: Stacey, can you give us an update on branch 512Y?
Stacey: You had me at “yak.”
King of Prussia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Stacey Quit 3 Weeks Later
Sales: What was the the address again? WW..?
Manager: …W?
Sales: Yeah that’s it, that sounds right. WWW.
160 McClaren Road
Coraopolis, Pennsylvania
