Manager to customer: Well, sir, you've caught me with my pants down!
Two peons passing by (simultaneously): Ewww!
Plymouth, Michigan
Co-Worker #1: Weather is the great conversational equalizer.
Co-Worker #2: Yeah.
Co-Worker #1: ‘Cause every place has weather. And chipmunks. But nobody ever talks about chipmunks.
1593 Galbraith Avenue
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Overheard by: Playtah
Supervisor, about harvesting crops: God, I'd love to plow all of this!
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Overheard by: Sabrina
CSR, after completing a phone call with customer: He just sounds strange on the phone. He's either foreign or from Canada. I don't know which.
Romulus, Michigan
Intern: So yeah, the first twenty minutes I was just sitting next to him in the breakroom I didn’t say a single word.
Engineer: Does he freak you out that much?
Intern: Well no, I just thought he didn’t speak any English.
Engineer: So you finally said something?
Intern: Yeah, I tried to make some small talk by asking what cubicle he sits in. But he spent the next 5-10 minutes trying to explain.
Engineer: He’s not that bad at English…
Intern: I don’t know. He kept asking what direction was North. By the time I made him point to it, I wished I never said anything. Seriously, what do cardinal directions have to do with your cubicle?
41131 Vincenti Court
Novi, Michigan
Middle-aged cashier to customer: Sometimes, when I’m on the toilet pooping, my cats come in and bite my feet!
Plymouth, Michigan
Sales #1: So what do they get in the three piece table, lamp and mirror set?
Sales #2: You’re kidding, right?
Sales #1: No really, what do they get?
Sales #2: Idiot.
2500 South Rochester Road
Rochester Hills, Michigan
Overheard by: Jenny Schneider
Joyous cube dweller: Yay! My ass works!
DIT
Lansing, Michigan
Overheard by: Across From The Shit Show
Coworker #1: So, what do you think about Nicole Richie? Do you think she’s anorexic?
Coworker #2: I don’t think she’s anorexic. I just think she never eats.
29111 Stephenson Highway
Madison Heights, Michigan
Overheard by: Make it stop
Judge: Son, there is a reason most murders take place between 10 pm and 4 am. If you do not want to *get* murdered, do not find yourself out at those times.
Detroit, Michigan
