Maintenance #1: Don’t break ’em off.
Maintenance #2: Don’t break what off?
Maintenance #1: These nuts.
224 South Michigan Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
Maintenance #1: Don’t break ’em off.
Maintenance #2: Don’t break what off?
Maintenance #1: These nuts.
224 South Michigan Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
Conductor: Tickets, please… Or in lieu of tickets, breakfast sandwiches will be accepted.
Chicago-bound commuter train
Overheard by: Pirate Alice
Male worker bee: Do you know it’s getting closer?
Female worker bee: Closer every day.
Male worker bee: But do you know what that means to me?
Female worker bee: I do. Eggs!
Intercourse, Pennsylvania
HR director to staff: Sarah Palin in a bikini with butter and Old Bay seasoning. Mmmm…
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Shaun
VP Fundraising: Mmm the aqueous coating on this brochure smells delicious.
Publication Manager: That’s the residue from my Krispy Kreme.
2300 4th Ave.
Rock Island, Illinois
Overheard by: Holly Sparkman
Customer: Do you have seven-packs of nuggets?
Cashier: We have eight or twelve.
Customer: Oh, wonderful. I’ll take twelve.
Orange City, Florida
Overheard by: laughing
Customer: Where is the fresh pasta?
Clerk: I don’t know. I’m new here, too.
Lompoc, California
Overheard by: Still Searching
Coworker #1: So you ate the cookies?
Coworker #2: Yeah, they had only been in the toilet for a second! Five second rule!
Coworker #1: That’s still disgusting.
Coworker #2: Well, hey, at least I didn’t lick my dirty foot.
Coworker #1: That was once! You’ve eaten cookies out of the toilet loads of times!
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Melissa
Coworker on phone: You’d be an amazing human being if you brought me some nibbles on your way here. If not, then you’re clearly the mongoloid I always suspected you to be.
401 West Clarendon Avenue
Phoenix, Arizona
Coworker in lunchroom: I just wanted a cake that said “your hair smells like lettuce”, and I shouldn't have to explain why!
Washington, DC
