Guest: Man, I really love your food!
Server: Thank you, sir.
Guest: It gives me the strength of a puma!
Server: Uh… thank you sir?
5th St
Cincinnati, Ohio
Guest: Man, I really love your food!
Server: Thank you, sir.
Guest: It gives me the strength of a puma!
Server: Uh… thank you sir?
5th St
Cincinnati, Ohio
Worker#1: Give me some jellybeans.
Worker#2: Fuck you! (pause) And don't call me jellybeans.
Clifton, New Jersey
Worker bee: Do I smell bacon, or am I just having a really awesome stroke?
175 Remsen Street
Brooklyn, New York
Overheard by: cubicle island
Purchasing manager: We’re renegades. We’re running with the wolves. We ordered hot chocolate.
1 Railroad Ave
Cooperstown, New York
Coworker: You keep hearing all this stuff about cherries being good for you. They’re actually not that good for you. It’s just what the people in northern Michigan say to get you to buy their cherries!
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Patron: Can I get some Equal for my tea?
Waitress: You mean, like, a lemon?
Phoenix, Arizona
Girl to friend: We should just spray them all with meat and unleash ravenous carnivores.
Reno, Nevada
Mom: If she gets convicted, I'm taking you to T.G.I. Friday's.
Son: Can we go even if she doesn't? Because it will feel like a victory either way, then.
Courthouse
Mentor, Ohio
Overheard by: Bird is the word
Maintenance #1: Don’t break ’em off.
Maintenance #2: Don’t break what off?
Maintenance #1: These nuts.
224 South Michigan Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
Conductor: Tickets, please… Or in lieu of tickets, breakfast sandwiches will be accepted.
Chicago-bound commuter train
Overheard by: Pirate Alice
