Female coworker: I think I’m going to go home. I’m not feeling well.
Gay coworker: I hope it’s not contagious.
Female coworker: No. It’s… woman problems. I don’t think you’ll get infected.
Gay coworker: You’d be surprised.
14th Street and Rhode Island Avenue
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Suprised
Meeting Attendee #1: When’s a good time to schedule the meeting with [Gary]?
Meeting Attendee #2: Well, he will be back from his heart attack next week.
2964 Peachtree Road NW
Atlanta, Georgia
Woman #1: I want a boy! How do I make a boy?
Woman #2: Like a baby?
Woman #1: Yeah, like a baby boy.
Woman #3: Well, my cousin did it! There's one way to get a girl, and another way to make a boy. I can ask him if you want.
Manhattan, New York
Manager #1: Back in the 90s I wanted to be in a Salt ‘n Pepa video. I was in shape back then. You could bounce a quarter off my ass.
Manager #2: Was that a quarter or a quarter pounder with cheese?
4235 South Stream Boulevard
Charlotte, North Carolina
Overheard by: Sanman
Supervisor: Trust me. I’ll take care of it.
Employee: The last time I heard that line I ended up pregnant.
631 Dickinson Avenue
Greenville, North Carolina
Shipping Manager: I can’t hear anything on my phone whenever I make or receive a call. Can you check it out for me?
IT Director: Did you get your hearing checked?
4055 Casilio Parkway
Clarence, New York
Supervisor: He hasn't been coming to work because he is an alcoholic.
Coworker: I know what that feels like. Last week I was drinking for a while in my yard and I totally pissed my pants. I had to wash them.
San Diego, California
Coworker #1: Who got chocolate all over the printer?
Coworker #2: You hope it's chocolate.
London
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Ewwwwww
Saleswoman: I've had this cough for weeks. It's in my back now. I'll cough so bad sometimes that I'll almost pee myself or I'll throw up. I've tried every over-the-counter medicine they make. Tylenol, Theraflu, I've tried them all. I just can't get rid of it.
Coworker: Cigarette?
Saleswoman: Yeah, I could really use one.
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: non-smoker
Boss: Maybe I’m suffering from a case of magnesia…uh, uh, you know, like I forget things.
75 Union Avenue
Rutherford, New Jersey
