Guy, while shopping: Naw, dude, the chainsaw really didn't go all that deep. It really didn't even hurt when it went in. My hand is healing up fine.
Jackson, Mississippi
Guy, while shopping: Naw, dude, the chainsaw really didn't go all that deep. It really didn't even hurt when it went in. My hand is healing up fine.
Jackson, Mississippi
Office lady #1, yawning: I don't know if I should get a coffee too, I just had a smoothie.
Office lady #2: Wouldn't you rather pee a bit more but yawn a lot less?
Calgary
Canadia
Owner: He's a great guy. Well, he can be a great guy. Sometimes. Okay, he's dying. He has cancer.
Indianapolis, Indiana
Cubicle rat to cubicle neighbor: I told you about the gynecologist who left me on the table to deliver a baby and didn't tell me, right?
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: This is why I wear headphones
Boss: Dave*! You look like you've lost weight! Ever think about getting one of those HIV tests?
Calgary
Canadia
Manager, in frustration: I have cough drops, tea, antibiotics, cough medicine, and I'm even wearing a panty liner in case I cough too hard.
Lawrenceville, Georgia
Claims supervisor to claims processor: You will need to send out a denial form on this one. The renter's policy does not cover contraction of sexually transmitted diseases while visiting the apartment.
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: GirlFriday
Female coworker to another: It was swollen and red and warm to the touch, I totally knew it was infected.
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Overheard by: O_o
Female sales rep #1: You know the one where you bend over and get it right in the spinal cord?
Female sales rep #2: Yeah, I know… kinda surprising.
Female sales rep #1: I'm all bent over and he's like “don't move, I don't wanna put it in the wrong spot!”
Delran, New Jersey
Overheard by: Bruce Banner
Coworker, to herself: Pills! I found pills! I found drugs! I am taking them!
Hanford, California
