A co-worker steps out of the elevator into the reception lobby.
Co-worker #1: Ew, it smells like a nursing home in here.
5 minutes pass.
Co-worker #2: Mmm, it smells good in here.
55 Southbank Boulevard
Melbourne, Victoria
Australia
Overheard by: Emily Hopkins
Salesman: Well, I worked my way up from a mechanic to a salesman, but I’m still treated like the low man on the scrotum pole.
625 Spring Street
Reading, Pennsylvania
Lady on phone: Girrrl, you done sound like an apple pie that’s been baked!
Evanston, Wyoming
CCA #1: The client says his squirrel machine’s broken. What the hell is a squirrel machine?
CCA #2: One of those things with the wheel, where the squirrels run around?
CCA #1: I don’t think we provide those.
CCA #2: What’s the problem?
CCA #1: He says it’s broken.
CCA #2: Is he feeding it enough?
2 Charlotte Street
Sackville, New Brunswick
Canadia
Co-worker: You were listening in on me talking to myself and not understanding the conversation!
261 W. 35th Street
New York, NY
Overheard by: simon feil
Matthew McConaughey’s mother: I wish you were Woody Harrelson. He always has better pot than you.
Patrick McConaughey: I fucking hate you too, mom. [out the window] Hey babe… don’t you know who I am?
Matthew: You people bring me down.
Backseat of the car I was driving
Austin, Texas
Sad boss: I'm sure there are a lot of normal people here, just not in this department.
Hartford, Connecticut
Lady peon #1: Man. I gave my mom her Christmas gift last night — you know, that DVD I got her yesterday — Rent.
Lady peon #2: Yeah.
Lady peon #1: Then I had to sit through two hours of that shit.
Lady peon #2: Is it that bad?
Lady peon #1: Nah, it ain’t that bad. It’s just all that damn singing…
Madison Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: Jake
Frustrated lawyer on phone: I know they are engineers! But I cannot draft a contract using only Venn diagrams, mathematic equations and animé references!
Lamar Overland Park
Kansas
Overheard by: Needs A Drink
Employee: Hey, it’s The Bobster! I was just out–
Bob: Seriously, why did you just add “the” and “ster” to my name?
27450 Ynez Road
Temecula, California
Overheard by: Jake Glazier
