Guy at urinal: Hi, Jim. Bad result over the weekend, wasn't it?
Jim: Yes, shame really.
Guy at urinal: Yeah.
(pause)
Jim: These tablets the doctor has me on really have improved my flow. It feels so good now.
Guy at urinal: Ummm? That's nice.
Exeter
Devon
England
Overheard by: Minding my own business
CSR to another: I had a bad day at work the other day… I got a brain freeze from the margarita.
Greeley, Colorado
Young admin, talking about boyfriend who just moved: Yeah, but I'm really good with long distance relationships.
Manger: So you say, but haven't you cheated on all your exes so far?
Young admin: Um, yeah…technically.
Manger: So basically you just always find someone to fill the hole when they're gone. Shit! I mean void…I *so* didn't mean it like that!
Santa Maria, California
Manager #1 (barely audible): Hey bud, did you go snowmobiling this weekend?
Manager #2 (yelling): Yeah man, I rode it all weekend and thought of you the whole time!
Bellevue City Center
Bellevue, Washington
Employee: Ew! You’re dousing your sandwich in tabasco sauce!
Intern: I’m dousing it in self-hatred.
4 W. Oakland Avenue
Doylestown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Vivian X
Secretary on phone: You are too happy, you aren't there alone, are you? (pause) Mmmmhmm, it is hot. (pause) I'm gonna let you go and call that crazy Tom* (pause) Oh, you wanna do a three-way instead? Let me see what I can do.
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Overheard by: Not in on the action
Employee on phone: Yeah, I’m leaving early today…Because if I don’t, I’ll kill someone. No, I mean it, someone will literally die at my hands, so I figure I’m helping out the company by leaving early.
900 Commonwealth Avenue
Boston, Massachusetts
Woman #1: How's it going?
Woman #2, sighing: I'm swimming through the mess…got my fingers in the dyke.
Boston, Massachusetts
Lawyer: You know they are bringing in immigrants and everything.
Conference caller: I don't know if I want to testify against a Sudanese refugee! Do we have to?
Lawyer: Something tells me we are not going to win this.
Phoenix, Arizona
Male coworker, messing with SIRIUS Radio: How does everyone feel about dance music? Yes? No?
Female coworker: No.
Male coworker: I like it, it makes me feel like I'm clubbing. Except that I don't go clubbing anymore. I'm worried about getting stabbed.
Female coworker: Uh…
Male coworker: I can't help it.
Female coworker: I guess you do have a pretty stabbable face…
Chicago, Illinois
