Coworker, about baby that she brought to office: Oh, she's three months old.
Random office worker: Do you have other children?
Coworker: Yes. Two. Both older.
Tallahassee, Florida
Coworker, about baby that she brought to office: Oh, she's three months old.
Random office worker: Do you have other children?
Coworker: Yes. Two. Both older.
Tallahassee, Florida
Female office worker: My mother's having surgery to remove a tumor in her breast today, so count me out for the lunch meeting, I'm going to wait for a phone call on her condition.
Male office worker (uncomfortably): Uh, I hope she's ok. Have you heard from Chris today?
Female office worker: No, he's coming in, right?
Male office worker: As far as I know, hope he doesn't have breast cancer.
Law Firm
New York City, New York
Female admin: I'll be in charge of this project–it'll be my baby.
Safety trainer: Retarded?
Storrs, Connecticut
Female coworker #1: Wow, is that guy old?
Female coworker #2: Yeah.
Female coworker #1: I was wondering, since you were writing his will. He seemed all “grrrrrrr”'!
Female coworker #2: Yeah… He's married.
Utica, New York
Overheard by: Internet Meme
Liberal cube dweller #1: I have so much to celebrate next week. My sister's birthday and the anniversary of Roe v. Wade.
Liberal cube dweller #2: You celebrate that?
Liberal cube dweller #1: Yes, I absolutely do.
Liberal cube dweller #2: What kind of cake do you get?
Liberal cube dweller #1: A fetus cake.
Liberal cube dweller #2: I have seen the fetus cookies, but I have never seen a fetus cake.
Liberal cube dweller #1: I'm kidding. Not about celebrating Roe v. Wade, but about having a fetus cake.
Liberal cube dweller #2: I'd eat a fetus cake.
Albany, New York
Overheard by: We are NOT Reception
Woman on phone: I thought that once my father died, my mom would be happy. But that was 25 years ago, and she's still miserable.
Huntington, New York
Lawyer on phone: …No…No….They can’t take your kids away for smokin’ pot, that’s bullshit…Ha, ha, ha!
500 5th Avenue
New York, NY
Slutty waitress: My baby daughter is driving me insane!
Waiter: That'll teach you to pass out at parties.
(slutty waitress glares, storms off)
Waiter, shrugging: Well, it should.
Circle Centre Mall
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Handyman: Can you see the pipe?
Owner of record store, with head in ceiling: Yeah, I think it's rusted though.
Handyman, under breath: Your mom's pipes are rusted through.
Newark, Delaware
Co-worker: She was like, “Nigga, just drop me off at daycare and go about your business.”
11100 USA Parkway
Fishers, Indiana
Overheard by: minkey
