Professor: So for Friday, you need me to get a big box.
University of British Columbia
Canadia
Professor: So for Friday, you need me to get a big box.
University of British Columbia
Canadia
Cook: So I'm going to school to get my MBA.
Waitress: Oh, what's that? “Master's, Bachelor's, and Associate's”?
Fort Worth, Texas
Financial Officer: See, I've always liked Shakespeare. I thought he was funny. You know, like Macbeth. Macbeth was funny. He was a crazy guy.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: frustrated intern
Admin #1: What are you eating? it smells terrible.
Admin #2: It's yogurt, for Christ's sake!
Admin #1: What kind of yogurt?
Admin #2: Strawberry yogurt!
Admin #1: With curdled strawberries! It stinks!
Admin #2: Look, Joe* was just here using the microwave to heat up ass.
Admin #1: That ass smelled delicious.
Fordham University
The Bronx, New York
Faculty member, leading prospective student on tour: This was when we used to have emotions.
Simmons College
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Not Yet Dead Inside
Consultant: I just pulled it out. I'm coming.
Louisiana State University
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Senior professor: So, Vladimir*, when will this project be finished?
PhD student: Time is a… dynamic thing!
University of Leuven
Belgium
Office drone to another: I learn something new from John every day. I forget what he said now, but I can repeat it right after he says it!
Plainsboro, New Jersey
Young female intern to male supervisor: Hey, Tom*, can I make your future baby?
Louisiana State University
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Coworker on cell: Hand. Hand. Balls, boobs… Smudge. What?
University of Illinois
Chicago, Illinois
