Older saleswoman, picking up the phone: Hello, this is Sue. How may I help you? Yes? Oh, no! Oh, dear! Definitely! Absolutely, just bring it on in and I’ll take care of it for you. No problem! I’m soooo sorry. I am so, so, so sorry!! [Hangs up phone.] I’m sorry your mother was a prostitute.
Department Store
Omaha, Nebraska
Overheard by: lisa
Boss: James, where's the flag?
Teenage employee: I don't know.
Boss: You were just wearing it around your shoulders.
Teenage employee: Oh, my superhero cape! It's right here.
BC
Canadia
IT professional #1: But the thing is that a lot of these people will need me forever… most of them are from 40-60 years old… Need I say more?
IT professional #2: Ugh, god! Just give them an abacus and call it a day.
Parnall Road
Jackson, Michigan
Overheard by: cubewalker
Coworker #1: Hey, you're letting you hair grow!
Coworker #2: I'm not letting it… it just is!
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Chris
Manager on phone: Does panting count as a response?
Pearl, Mississippi
Overheard by: Brain Dancing
On-line dating girl: No emails today.
Unimpressed supervisor: Oh.
On-line dating girl: Yeah, I come in on Mondays and see who's written to me over the weekend and write responses.
Unimpressed supervisor: Don't you do that at home?
On-line dating girl: Oh, no! I'm not online at home–I can't afford it!
Sydney
Australia
Male employee: Did you see the check stop?
Female employee: What? Where!
Male employee: Right outside the office.
Female employee: Why do they have a check stop there? It's only 3:15 pm. Who drives drunk at 3 pm on a Wednesday?
Male employee: John would, but he's stuck here right now!
John, overhearing from office: Hey!
Calgary
Canadia
Server to hippie-looking female customer with big smartphone: That's a big phone.
Customer: Yeah, it's the actual case of the phone that makes it big. I'm clumsy so it needs the equivalent of a football helmet. (pause) And I'm really important.
Durango, Colorado
Overheard by: nrr
Customer: Do you have seven-packs of nuggets?
Cashier: We have eight or twelve.
Customer: Oh, wonderful. I’ll take twelve.
Orange City, Florida
Overheard by: laughing
Customer: Where is the fresh pasta?
Clerk: I don’t know. I’m new here, too.
Lompoc, California
Overheard by: Still Searching
