Customer: Do you have ornaments of cities?
Employee: Yes, over here.
Customer: I'm looking for Seattle, it will probably have the Space Needle on it.
Employee: Sorry, I don't see that. We have astronauts, though.
Christmas Store
Frankenmuth, Michigan
Overheard by: Anita
Female client: I'll have to go over this with my partner.
Clued-out accountant: Oh. I didn't know you were a lesbian.
Female client: My business partner.
Toronto
Canadia
Female server: Hello my name is Samantha* and I will be your server today. Daniel* is in training, so do you mind if he helps out?
Female customer: No. You can double team me anytime.
Male customer: That's what she said.
Jackson, Tennessee
Grocery store clerk: What is this?
Customer: It's a cucumber.
Troy, Michigan
Overheard by: The Natural EMP
Salesperson: I can get you a package over today to look at.
Client: I'd love to see your package today.
Springdale, Ohio
Borders customer: It's by… I don't know her name, but she's the new Poet Laureate.
Borders clerk: Her name is “Laureate”?
Borders customer, sighing: Never mind.
Sunnyvale, California
Female client on exercise bike: It's squeaking somewhere.
Maintenance man on his knees before her and bike: I've lubed every part I can find!
Searcy, Arkansas
Seemingly normal customer: It's revealing when the lolly-boxes clatter, isn't it? Revealing!
Cashier: Er, yes. (awkward laughter)
Vegetable Shop
Western Australia
Australia
Overheard by: Cara
Customer: How much does one of those pork chops weigh?
Meat market employee: It depends on how big they are.
Peoria, Illinois
Event coordinator, after stuttering to clients during meeting: I'm sorry, I must have left my mouth in my other pants.
Lincoln, Nebraska
Overheard by: Complete Composure
