Coworker #1: I just got this suit at Paul Stuart. Do you like it?
Coworker #2: Yeah, you look like the Easter Pimp.
101 East 42nd Street
New York, New York
Overheard by: Amazed
Coworker #1: I just got this suit at Paul Stuart. Do you like it?
Coworker #2: Yeah, you look like the Easter Pimp.
101 East 42nd Street
New York, New York
Overheard by: Amazed
Boss: Yeah, I was at a funeral yesterday. My friend had a three-week-old pass away.
Coworker: Man, that's awful. What happened?
Boss: Well, it's kinda funny…
Raleigh, North Carolina
Peon: I was normally born, and I have a normal head!
11149 Research Boulevard
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: across the cube
Young guy #1, staring at screen, to guy next to him: Fine, don't fucking chat to me then. I'm putting you on ignore.
Young guy #2, staring at screen: Facebook logged me out! (jabbing frantically at mouse button) I can't log back in!
Young guy #1, still staring at his screen: How the fuck are we going to chat then?
Ward Library
University of Western Sydney
Australia
Worker #1: What's up wit dat new chick, the one haulin' dirt, she Korean?
Worker #2: Naw, she's Native American.
Worker #1: Dat's hot yo, I wonder what Indian pussy taste like?
Worker #2: (long pause) Maize?
WTC Memorial Site
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Bob
Normal coworker: Jackie* is in Vegas, isn't she?
Less normal coworker: Yeah.
Normal coworker: I wonder how hot it is there?
Less normal coworker: Probably about 107 degrees.
Normal coworker: I don't think I could handle that kind of heat. I would have to stay inside the whole time.
Less normal coworker: Nah, you just sit out under the flamingos and let them pee water on ya. Keeps ya cool.
Ypsilanti, Michigan
Overheard by: Cube Dweller
New coworker: My name's Dave* and my eccentricity is I like everything in paper, not plastic.
Eugene, Oregon
Overheard by: dying a slow death here
Office drone #1: Would you go get me a coffee, please?
Office drone #2: What?
Office drone #1: I asked you to get me some coffee.
Office drone #2: (silence)
Office drone #1: I did say “please.”
Office drone #2: Okay, then. (pause) No, thank you.
Manhattan, New York
Woman #1: Oh, look at the pretty rock!
Woman #2: Um… that’s part of a blueberry muffin.
Woman #1: Oh.
Monument Circle
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Gitcher Eyes Checked
Cougar colleague: It was so embarrassing–I was putting cream on my buns…
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: confused but amused
