Coworker #1: Are the lights in the office flickering?
Coworker #2: No, you're just having a stroke.
Chicago, Illinois
Coworker #1: Are the lights in the office flickering?
Coworker #2: No, you're just having a stroke.
Chicago, Illinois
Male coworker #1: Oh, come on. You know you wanted to be in a frat.
Male coworker #2: I am a frat of one.
Linden Street
Fort Collins, Colorado
Overheard by: Ethan Holbrook
Coworker #1, eating lunch: What have you got there? Steak?
Coworker #2: No, it's lamb.
Coworker #1: What's the difference?
Coworker #2: It comes from a lamb.
Waltham, Massachusetts
Employee #1: I always thought it was pronounced “fass-mile”. What is it?
Employee #2: Facsimile. It’s a fax.
Employee #1: Oh, I’ve never heard it called that before.
50 Oak Court
Danville, California
Office drone #1: Last week I was on MySpace, and I dropped my old high school girlfriend a line. Would you see this as being friendly or creepy?
Office drone #2: Well, did you search specifically for her?
Office drone #1: No, I seriously just happened across her through my high school’s page, but unbeknownst to me she had just recently set up her account. I’m just freaked out that it looks like I’ve been trolling the internet waters waiting for her to surface and then, bam! Ten years ago that would have been the case, but not now.
Liberty Drive
Bloomington, Indiana
Overheard by: giselle
First-time father of twins to female coworker: So, when do newborns open their eyes?
Coworker: Um…it's not like kittens, babies are born with their eyes open.
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Dea at work
Coworker at postage meter: Normally I'm anal and I look at 'em every time I stuff 'em… But not today.
Seattle, Washington
Coworker on phone: Well, we just have to have choices because he is a vegetarian. (pause) Yeah, milk is okay, it's dairy, just no turkey or ham. (pause) Sure, eggs are fine, that's dairy. (pause) Well, I mean, it's fine, it hasn't been born yet!
Charlotte, North Carolina
Man: So what’s that building over there?
Tour guide: That’s the Wrigley Building.
Man: So what does Wrigley do?
Tour guide: They make gum.
Man: Gum? Really? What kind of gum?
Michigan Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
Woman (after manager jokingly pats her on the back): Hey, don’t be coming in here hitting me!
Manager: No, no, I wouldn’t do that. I haven’t hit a woman in a long time. You know when the last time I hit a woman was? It was my ex-wife, and it was goooooood. I spent two days in jail, but it was worth it. It was soooo worth it. They had to wire her jaw shut. Six weeks. Six weeks of silence.
Woman: That’s nice, but could you leave now, please?”
Wilmington, North Carolina
