Co-worker on phone: Okay, go home and make dinner and await further instructions.
133 Littleton Road
Westford, Massachusetts
Co-worker on phone: Okay, go home and make dinner and await further instructions.
133 Littleton Road
Westford, Massachusetts
Straight cube girl: Straight people are a dime a dozen! It’s hard to find a good lesbian lover. You, of all people, should know that.
Straight cube guy: I know, I know.
350 Madison Avenue
New York, New York
Coworker #1: Do you know where Chris is? Is he still alive?
Coworker #2: Who?
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Ali
Co-worker #1: [Justin], can I borrow your finance guide?
Co-worker #2: Um, sure…Wait, it’s not here. I did have one, but it’s gone.
Co-worker #1: Yeah, I borrowed it.
Co-worker #2: …
233 Broadway
New York, NY
Peon on phone: She’s right that it doesn’t make sense, but it’s what we should do.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Office girl #1: So, she’s like, definitely got AIDS… That’s what I heard.
Office girl #2: Really? No way! She’s way too fat to have AIDS. It makes you really skinny.
Office girl #1: I wish I had AIDS — you could eat whatever you liked.
Office girl #2: Yeah, I suppose… It would mean you might die, though.
Office girl #1: Hmmm, we’re all gonna some day, though.
Office girl #2: Yeah.
London
England
Overheard by: Cecilia
Worker #1: Who’s that?
Worker #2: What, the new temp?
Worker #1: Oh. What happened to the other lady?
Worker #2: She was too over-qualified.
Worker #1: What, and the new guy’s not? What is his experience?
Worker #2: Well, he was a turd farmer from poor Virginia.
Des Moines, Iowa
Assistant #1: What if you get a busy signal?
Assistant #2: That means it’s busy.
Assistant #1, after a long pause: Thank you.
450 N Street
Sacramento, California
Overheard by: Assistant #3
Sassy Latina operations manager: Where have you been?!?! You’ve been gone for like an hour!
Spunky marketing manager: What? I was getting a bikini wax!
Sassy Latina operations manager: Oh. [pause] I *thought* your pants looked looser.
M Street, Washington DC
Korean chick, gasping: It smells like drunk Mexican in here!
144 South Glendale Avenue
Glendale, California
