PhD #1: So we need to find babies who’s mothers smoked during their pregnancies.
PhD #2: What would be great is if we could find some pregnant women who smoke and monitor the fetus before, and a while after birth. But that’s kinda illegal and unethical.
PhD #1: Yeah, we can’t really encourage women to continue smoking while they’re pregnant.
30 South 2000 East
Salt Lake City, Utah
Overheard by: whitney
Coworker to boss: Wait, rewind. I didn't understand what you said.
Boss: Blahdebludebloop! That was me rewinding.
Littleton, New Hampshire
Cube rat girl: You’ve really contributed to my progress as a human being. Like, I’ve learned all these new terms from you. Like ‘owned,’ and ‘oh, word?’ And ‘meh’!
Cube rat guy: See? So what would your life be like without me?
Cube rat girl: Well, I think pretty much the same, but with a few less words.
350 Madison Avenue
New York, New York
Parts store clerk #1 to parts store clerk #2: I don't know about taking this test. These words they use, I don't know where they get these words from. Maybe it's just me, cause I'm from the South.
Customer, chuckling: Them can't be real words, can they?
Parts clerk #1: No.
Parts clerk #2: You're just way too country to take that test.
Decatur, Tennessee
Client: Guess who I met today?
Staff: Who?
Client: Some guy on the bus that used to go here, but I don’t know his name.
4558 Roswell Road
Atlanta, Georgia
Thuggette: I don't know what a penis is for. I don't even know how to put a condom on. All you need to know is to put it in, take it out, wash it off, and go to sleep. It's a mushroom. A long-ass stink mushroom. Shit.
Washington, DC
Co-Worker #1: You look so different today.
Co-Worker #2: Yeah, I’m not drunk, I shaved, and I took a shower.
9603 Meridian Boulevard
Englewood, Colorado
Receptionist to coworker: Bagels can absorb alcohol just as easily as eggs and sausage!
Manhattan, New York
Cubicle farmer: Did you know that George Bush is a genius?
55 East 52nd Street
New York, NY
HQ division head: Nothing is too good for down range, therefore down range shall get nothing.
U.S. Forces “Diplomatic Training”
Riyadh, Saudi Arabia
Big fat receptionist: Ooh what is that?
Office worker #1: A caramel mochiatto from Starbucks.
Big fat receptionist: I hope you brought me one!
Office worker #2: Do you have any idea how many calories are in one of those?
200 Park Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Sebastian O’Conner
