Employee: You're not going to a chiropractor, are you?
Boss: No. She's a lesbian voodoo doctor. She's next to a bagel shop.
Vancouver
Canadia
Employee: You're not going to a chiropractor, are you?
Boss: No. She's a lesbian voodoo doctor. She's next to a bagel shop.
Vancouver
Canadia
Office girl: And that game of Pictionary nearly broke up our family.
Scarborough
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: C.note
Suit #1: Hey, Jeff*, has there ever been a Friday-the-13th on a Monday?
Suit #2: Uh…
Suit #1: Man, that would be the worst day ever.
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Crew chief on phone: Hello?…No, I can’t talk right now, my truck is on fire….Okay, I’ll call you back. My truck is on fire….Okay, I’ll deal with this tonight. My truck is on fire….Okay my truck is on fire, I can’t really talk right now….Okay, my truck is literally on fire beneath me, I’ll call you back.
303 Second Street West
Brooks, Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: Shane Parker
Worker, about endoscope diameters: The smaller they are, the more expensive… like bikinis.
Toronto
Canadia
CEO: I hit a garbage truck this morning!
Admin: What?
CEO: I hit a garbage truck this morning! Broadsided it! Never even saw it!
Admin: You didn’t see a garbage truck?
CEO: I know! I was doing like 40 miles an hour! And my kid was in the car!
1190 Del Rio Place
Ontario, Canada
Overheard by: Never riding with the boss
Older woman #1: What are you going to do while you’re here?
Young man: Oh, I’m gonna shop like a mofo!
Older woman #1: Mofo? What is that?
Older woman #2: What does that mean?
Young man: Uh…it, uh…means I’m gonna shop a lot!
Older woman #2: Oh…Is that a Negro term?
Victoria, British Columbia
Canadia
Overheard by: J. Max
Newly hired girl, learning computer system: *gasp* Oh my god, I just figured out why Chevron gas stations are called Chevron!
(senior girl rolls eyes)
Newly hired girl, a minute later: *gasp!*
Senior girl: What? Did you just figure out what Shell gas stations are named after?
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: why did we hire her again?
Employee #1: So the guy in jail I was telling you about, he’s dead! [Laughs]Employee #2: Ooh, that’s great for you then, right?
Employee #1: No, it was the wrong guy. There were two guys sitting in jail, and one of them died, but it was the wrong one.
Employee #2: So you owe your friend money?
Employee #1: Well not until the other guy dies. [pause] This is pretty morbid isn’t it?
Sparks Street
Ottawa, Canadia
Overheard by: a poor little intern
