Girl: Just so you know, I have a gigantic cyst on my vagina.
9050 Washington Boulevard
Culver City, California
Girl: Just so you know, I have a gigantic cyst on my vagina.
9050 Washington Boulevard
Culver City, California
Sailor, with sheet to sign: I need your signature on this.
Boss man: Ok, do you have a pen?
Sailor: Uh… No.
Boss: Tell me, Frank, how am I supposed to sparkle if you don’t give me any glitter? [Storms out of the room.]
Pt. Mugu Naval Base, California
Attorney: Do you have an extra pen I can have?
Receptionist: Sure.
Attorney (writing with pen): Actually, I'm kind of suspicious of this pen. I'll just go get one of my own.
Hall of Justice Building
Sacramento, California
Overheard by: Liz
Co-worker #1: We’re going to a vegetarian place for lunch.
Co-worker #2: Do you think they’ll have fish there?
3415 S. Sepulveda Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Coworker #1: So, I’ve been reading What to Expect When You’re Expecting, and I had no idea about the Toni Braxton-Taylor Hicks thing.
Coworker #2: … The what?
Coworker #1: You know, the false labor…
Coworker #2: You mean Braxton Hicks?
Coworker #1: Yes, Toni Braxton-Taylor Hicks. I had no idea it was called that.
Coworker #2: It’s not called that. Please stop calling it that.
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: It’s REALLY not called that
Male employee to female employee: It’s like you’re stuck in a really bad version of The Devil Wears Prada, except this time the devil wears Lane Bryant stretch pants…
75 Hawthorne Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: At Least I Wear H&M…
IT assisting in HR: Yeah, I just got back from CES. They had the adult entertainment convention on the floor above. [name of pornstar] walked by and I told her she looked shorter in person than on film.
Employee, laughing: I can't believe this conversation is happening in HR.
Sonora, California
Overheard by: Breezy
Middle-aged dad: Frankie Laine died.
20-ish son: Who the fuck is Frankie Laine?
Middle-aged dad: He was a great singer. He sang the theme from Blazing Saddles.
20-ish son: That was 40 fucking years ago. What did he die of, irrelevancy?
Middle-aged dad: You’re too young to appreciate anything.
20-ish son: I fucking hate it when you say that.
Blockbuster
Oceanside, California
Attorney: An Interested Party is any board member who receives, or whose spouse or descendants receives, financial gain from the corporation.
Board member: So if my son works here, then I’m not an Interested Party.
Attorney: Your son is your descendant.
Board member: Are you sure?
1524 North Santa Fe Avenue
Vista, California
Helpful librarian: Here is an explanation of the changes a boy goes through, and masturbation.
Shocked redfaced teen: No, I said books on emancipation!
Ceres, California
