Female suit on phone in restroom stall: Sorry, I'm in the restroom. So how was the other night? (pause) Oh…I see…what do you mean you didn't do him? (pause) That guy was adorable! There's no excuse for that! (pause, then in a subdued tone) Oh, he likes men…
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Forbes
Coworker #1, shadowboxing and humming: Dom, duh-duh, dom.
Coworker #2: Are you singing Eye of the Tiger?
Coworker #1: No, I am singing Rocky.
Coworker #2: But that is Eye of the Tiger.
Coworker #1: Are you sure? I thought it was Rocky.
Coworker #2: No, it’s Eye of the Tiger.
Coworker #1: What movie was that?
Coworker #2: Are you a moron?
1160 Battery Street
San Francisco, California
Boss: The funniest thing just happened. I’ve had a banana in my bag for like a month. When I opened my bag a whole bunch of gnats flew out!
Underling: Is that why there are flys all over our windowless office?
Boss: No.
10201 W. Pico Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
HR admin to uninterested IT guy: I’ll be perfectly happy once I’m not morbidly obese.
1037 West 9th Street
Upland, California
Overheard by: Convinced she’s correct
Male coworker: So, did you hear about what Shannon* did for her grandmother’s birthday?
Female coworker: Yeah!
Male coworker: How she got her a stripper?
Female coworker: Yeah, haha. I know!
Male coworker: Pretty funny… She was, like, 90… Did you hear that she died like a week later?
Female coworker: Yeah…
Male coworker: Yeah. It kinda sucks.
Beverly Drive
Beverly Hills, California
Overheard by: Audiogirl Hates Elevators
Girl: Just so you know, I have a gigantic cyst on my vagina.
9050 Washington Boulevard
Culver City, California
Sailor, with sheet to sign: I need your signature on this.
Boss man: Ok, do you have a pen?
Sailor: Uh… No.
Boss: Tell me, Frank, how am I supposed to sparkle if you don’t give me any glitter? [Storms out of the room.]
Pt. Mugu Naval Base, California
Attorney: Do you have an extra pen I can have?
Receptionist: Sure.
Attorney (writing with pen): Actually, I'm kind of suspicious of this pen. I'll just go get one of my own.
Hall of Justice Building
Sacramento, California
Overheard by: Liz
Co-worker #1: We’re going to a vegetarian place for lunch.
Co-worker #2: Do you think they’ll have fish there?
3415 S. Sepulveda Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Coworker #1: So, I’ve been reading What to Expect When You’re Expecting, and I had no idea about the Toni Braxton-Taylor Hicks thing.
Coworker #2: … The what?
Coworker #1: You know, the false labor…
Coworker #2: You mean Braxton Hicks?
Coworker #1: Yes, Toni Braxton-Taylor Hicks. I had no idea it was called that.
Coworker #2: It’s not called that. Please stop calling it that.
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: It’s REALLY not called that
