Boss: This lady is coming at 4:30 to pick her labels. So call when they are ready.
Lackey: If she's coming at 4:30, why should I call her?
Boss: So she knows when they are ready. And call me too.
Lackey: So, do I call her or you?
Boss: Both of us.
Pennsylvania
General manager: I told you to respect your boss. I didn’t tell you to obey her orders.
230 North College Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Intern #1: I need to talk to you, there is an issue with a drop-down menu.
Boss: You are like the problem child I never wanted!
Intern #2: What about me?
Boss: You know a lot about alcohol.
Boylston Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Program Director: I’ll have to re-look that back up.
50 Beale Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Office Cog
Perky career director: We're here to service all of you!
Washington, DC
Overheard by: theintern
Warehouse supervisor #1: Man, my computer at home is running slow.
Warehouse supervisor #2: Why, what's up?
Warehouse supervisor #1: I downloaded some porn but I had to delete it so my wife didn't see it.
Warehouse supervisor #2: Okay, so what's the problem now?
Warehouse supervisor #1: I found pron that was downloaded by my wife.
Warehouse supervisor #2, laughing: Guess you're not the only neglected one in the house.
California
Waiter: There's a fly buzzing around. I kept him off your food.
Manager: Ah, it doesn't matter. Nobody ever died from that.
Waiter: Nobody ever died from licking my balls, either. You want to come over here and do that?
Circle Centre Mall
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Engineer: How much longer will you be using those prints?
Safety Manager: Five minutes.
Engineer: What if I borrow them for three minutes and then give them back to you?
Safety Manager: I’d say yes, but you won’t give them back in three minutes. So, no, you can’t borrow them.
Engineer: You’re so much like your dad, it’s not even funny.
186 Gilman Avenue
Campbell, California
Overheard by: Shannon
Office Manager: How do you go out to lunch and come back with a huge cucumber?
Employee: How do men go out at night and come back with hookers?
Office Manager: Huh?
Employee: It’s the same basic principle.
110 N. Washington Street
Rockville, Maryland
Overheard by: Joan
CFO: I had a hamster once. His name was MC Hamster.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Elisabeth
