Supervisor sniffles and rubs eyes.
Brand new employee: Do you have allergies?
Supervisor: No, I am crying because you work here.
1701 16th Avenue
Gainesville, Florida
Supervisor sniffles and rubs eyes.
Brand new employee: Do you have allergies?
Supervisor: No, I am crying because you work here.
1701 16th Avenue
Gainesville, Florida
Boss to secretary: I think we need to have this copy machine looked at.
Secretary: Is something wrong?
Boss: It's stapling things on the bottom instead of the top.
Los Angeles, California
Bos: So, do you lift weights?
New guy: Uh, yeah, sometimes.
Boss: Because man, I’d hate to run into your chest at 40 miles an hour!
Co-worker: Why would that ever happen?
1710 Roy Acuff Place
Nashville, Tennessee
Manager: Would you like to buy a Lab?
Subordinate: Like, a meth lab?
Manager: Umm, no. Like, a dog.
Little Rock, Arkansas
Boss: The funniest thing just happened. I’ve had a banana in my bag for like a month. When I opened my bag a whole bunch of gnats flew out!
Underling: Is that why there are flys all over our windowless office?
Boss: No.
10201 W. Pico Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Attorney: I need a [investi]gator for a hand job.
Staff: Ha, ha! You mean a ‘hand delivery’?
South Jefferson Avenue
Springfield, Missouri
Overheard by: Left Lobe
Manager: We’re going to have to let you go.
Employee: I didn’t do nothin’!
Manager: I personally caught you defecating into the employee bathroom sink.
Employee: The toilet was filthy!
95 South Illinois Street
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Coworker to another about manager: So he said, ‘If someone comes into your office crying, just ignore it. It used to freak me out, but now I realize it happens all the time.’
46th Street and 3rd Avenue
New York, New York
Sales person: Hmmm… Are you doing the billing today since Sherry* is out?
Trainee: I’m going to try.
Sales person: Well, don’t mess up my billing or I’ll kick your ass.
Trainee: Promise?
Sales person: Oh, yes.
Trainee: My pain is your pleasure.
Sales person: You and I will get along fine.
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Manager in sales meeting: I want you to ask for my help. I'm like a tool in your tool box. I am a tool.
Sacramento, California
