Irate phone salesgirl: You are putting words in my mouth, and you do not know me well enough to be putting anything in my mouth!
Chicago, Illinois
Irate phone salesgirl: You are putting words in my mouth, and you do not know me well enough to be putting anything in my mouth!
Chicago, Illinois
Shop assistant: So, can I help you with anything else?
50-something woman: Yes, I'd like a big, long screw. About this big. (she demonstrates with hands)
Shop assistant: Wouldn't we all!
Hardware Store
Australia
Overly exuberant raffle organizer: I'll drag someone in, blindfold them, and say “stick your hand in this!”
New England
Overheard by: Dude
Suit: I saw a dude on the train this morning with an ass so big when he sat down he got taller!
Jersey City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Hobo Whisperer
Office worker: Are my eyebrows falling out?
New Orleans, Louisiana
IT dude: There's a lot of balls floating around, and I just grab the ones I can.
Seattle, Washington
Underling: How big is yours?
Team lead: I don’t know, let’s see.
(pause)
Team lead: Man, that’s big!
Underling: If you think that’s big, that makes mine huge.
Team lead: Really? Let’s see it.
Underling: Okay.
(pause)
Team lead: Wow. You weren’t kidding.
Fayetteville, Arkansas
Overheard by: Jonathan
Lackey: I'm secure in my masculinity. I can wear balls on my head.
Memphis, Tennesee
Overheard by: Rabbit
Female coworker #1: Why are you looking at my stomach?
Female coworker #2: I ain't looking at your stomach. I am looking *down there*.
Female coworker #1: What's “down there”?
New York City, New York
CSR on phone: I'll have to look at the e-mail again, I think it had something to do with breasts…
Passerby: When doesn't it?
Norwood, Massachusetts
Overheard by: I thought so…
