Because Now I Have to Go See

Manager: I was walking my dog this morning when I felt a pain in a very private place, so I ran inside my house and pulled my pants down in my living room, and a fire ant had bitten me on my you-know-what!
Employee: Ouch?
Manager: It really itches. I keep going to the bathroom and pulling down my pants and looking at it and touching it, but I’m scared to put any medicine on my private place.
Employee: Oh. That is a problem.
Manager: I know. Oh, I’m itching again, I’ll be right back. [Goes to the restroom.]Employee, to coworker: I’m picturing her 50-year-old, ant-bitten vagina right now, and I want to stab myself to get that image out of my head.

Sandwich shop
South Carolina

Posted on April 29, 2022
Body Parts, Bosses and Underlings, Health & Hygiene, South Carolina

As Adam Said to Eve

Project manager to programming team: This is the first time I've seen it. It's already long, and it's getting bigger. I don't know how big it will get, but this is probably going to be hard.

Kansas City, Missouri

Posted on April 20, 2022
Admins, Body Parts, Missouri, Sexuality, Weirdness, Words

Dante's Inferno Was Actually Set in Yonkers

Older lady: The bag can't go through the ass! I'm writing him an e-mail. He's taking this shit back.
Younger lady: Hey, are we allowed to drop the s-bomb on packaging?

Yonkers, New York

Overheard by: Jay B

Posted on April 18, 2022
Body Parts, Health & Hygiene, New York, Questions, Weirdness

But Could We Not Have This Conversation at the Urinal?

Boss: You like that little tool, don't you?
Worker: The keyboard? Yeah, it's great.

Uniontown, Ohio

Posted on April 15, 2022
Body Parts, Bosses and Underlings, Ohio, Possible Sexual Harassment, Questions

Judging from His Coffee Mug

College secretary: George loved my dip!
College rep: He also likes penis.

Syracuse, New York

Overheard by: it's true

Posted on April 12, 2022
Admins, Body Parts, Compare and contrast, Education, Employees, New York, Smoking

Conveniently Stored In This Nacelle Under Your Fuselage

Manager looking at engineering drawing: Where are my nuts?

Everett, Washington

Posted on April 1, 2022
Body Parts, Bosses, Questions, Washington

Dear Diary– I Talked to Someone at Work Today!

CSR to IT guy carrying video camera on tripod: Hey, it's tripod man!
IT guy: What else can I say but thanks!

Insurance Office
Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: Dadn8tr

Posted on March 21, 2022
Body Parts, Customer Service, Oregon, Sexuality, Tech People, Technology

So I'll Be Out Of Work for a While

Coworker: It was so good I licked my box!

Melbourne
Australia

Overheard by: confused but amused

Posted on March 18, 2022
Australia, Body Parts, Compare and contrast, Coworkers, Sensory Experiences, Sexuality

Why Gay Porn Stars Are So Healthy

Gay hairstylist: But people who have anal don't get prostrate cancer…
Manager: They only get hemorrhoids.
Gay hairstylist: That's true, after a while it looks like a cauliflower. But, anyway, we do not get prostate cancer, because the cock acts like a massage therapist.
Manager: Riiiiight!

Sao Paulo
Brazil

Posted on March 9, 2022
Body Parts, Bosses, Brazil, Compare and contrast, Employees, Gays and lesbians, Health & Hygiene, Meals and Snacks, Physical Appearance, Sexuality

Three’s Normal, Right?

Well-dressed 30-something woman: So my son was like: “Mom! There’s this ball in my privates and it’s moving around!” So I told him to talk to his father because I want nothing to do with this conversion. So he says: “Dad! There’s this ball in my privates and it’s moving around!” and my husband goes: “Yeah -’cause those are your balls. Women have boobs and men have balls and those are your balls! End of story.”
Slightly horrified 20-something woman: Don’t you think that will ultimately confuse him?
30-something woman: I know, right?! Anyway, it was so funny… [Laughs] Balls!

Providence, Rhode Island

Posted on February 20, 2022
Body Parts, Coworkers, Default, Family, Health & Hygiene, Parents, Questions, Rhode Island

Body Parts