Arts

Nurse #1: You better grab that. It’s leaning like the Leaning Tower of Pisa.
Nurse #2: Oh, I’ve never been to France.

339 Windermere Road
London, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Amanda

Supervisor: Did someone order colored pencils from the office supply place?
Assistant: I’m thinking of becoming a caricaturist.

330 Madison Ave
New York City

Employee: Did you see the Accounting Department? They are all dressed up like the Village People… or the Seven Dwarfs — I’m not sure.

100 Mountain Road
Framingham, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Snow Whitefish

Hipster: You know, you can really tell who loved the Smurfs as a kid.

610 SW Broadway
Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: Maggie Mae

Woman #1: Hey! Look at you! I didn’t know you were back from maternity leave.
Woman #2: Yeah, I just came back yesterday.
Woman #1: I saw the pictures you emailed. She’s adorable. I remember you were worried about labor. How’d it go?
Woman #2: Not too bad, actually. Kind of what I expected. Although I punched my husband and threatened divorce during the worst of it.
Woman #1: Are you serious? What did he do?
Woman #2: Right when my contractions were about two minutes apart, he got nervous and attempted to distract me. So he kept making that ooohbah, ooohbah noise that those robot things made in Revenge of the Sith.
Woman #1: Omigod! I know what you’re talking about. What a jerk! That’s so funny, though.
Woman #2: Yeah, I know. We laugh about it now. But at the time I punched him in the stomach and called him a bastard. I told him if he opened his mouth again even to cough, we were getting a divorce. Poor guy wouldn’t even talk to the nurses after that.

777 Eisenhower Parkway
Ann Arbor, Michigan

Boss: Wow, this [stapler] is heavy.
Co-worker: It’s from a movie.
Boss: What movie?
Co-worker: Office Space.
Boss: Is that a comedy?

1 Railroad Avenue
Cooperstown, New York

Office manager: He kinda looks like a Ninja Turtle.
Receptionist: What?
Office manager: A Ninja Turtle. Don’t you see it?
Receptionist: Ummm…
Office manager: You know, a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle.
Receptionist: Oh, that kind of Ninja Turtle… I don’t see it.

2661 Riva Road
Annapolis, Maryland

Overheard by: aoK

Designer: I can’t find a photo to represent personal trainers. The only stock images we have are too creepy. Look kind of like an after-school special.
Writer: Like a molesting-kids after-school special? Or the kind about bulimia?
Designer: A cross between those and the ones about steroids.
Creative director: Oh. That sounds OK. Use whatever you guys have.

16340 North Scottsdale Road
Scottsdale, Arizona

Cubicle dweller on phone: We're all right, but our piano isn't. It's been through some stuff.

Chicago, Illinois

Boss, showing book owned by Thomas Jefferson: You know, I get turned on by Jefferson.

Richmond, Virginia